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Iola94's favorite FMLs
by Bug / 10/15/2012 at 5:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML
by triple l / 10/15/2012 at 4:33am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Nickki / 10/14/2012 at 10:57am / United States / Kids
by lonelygirl / 10/14/2012 at 8:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy
Today, my crush and I were volunteering at a local farm. He confessed to me that I'm one of the most beautiful girls he's ever seen. Just as he leaned in to kiss me, I lost my footing and fell into a pile of horse shit. He just stood there, pointing and laughing. FML
by FarmerGirl / 10/09/2012 at 2:43pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love
by The Last Cockbender / 10/06/2012 at 1:09pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
Today, after having bought my daughter a complete set of new school clothes, she threw a tantrum and refused to wear them. I told her she could either wear them, or go to school naked. She made if half-way down the street in the nude before I caught up and dragged her back inside. FML
by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 2:22pm / United Kingdom (Wokingham) / Kids
Today, my neighbors discovered Gangnam Style. Ever since I moved in, they've had an obsession with getting wasted by noon and blasting out shitty music all through the evening. I could just about deal with their dubstep fixation before, but now I just want to blow my own head off. FML
by Can you say "bandwagon"? / 10/03/2012 at 5:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, I started working my crappy, minimum-wage retail job at a local electronics store. An hour into my shift, my boss sent me to scrub out a discount bin, after some drunk cunt in his teens staggered into the place yelling, and puked his guts into it. What a life. FML
by what the fuck, mate / 09/30/2012 at 3:00pm / Australia / Work
by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 12:37am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am terrified. FML
by Anonymous / 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm / United States (Colorado) / Work
by strawberrywine22 / 09/27/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/24/2012 at 3:09pm / United States / Love
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…