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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, a repairman came to fix my couch, which is under warranty because the frame had broken in multiple places. To ensure I got a new couch out of the deal, I stabbed multiple holes into the cushion. The guy fixed the frame, but said there was nothing he could do about lacerations on the sofa. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3068) - you deserved it (60468)
On 05/02/2012 at 8:43pm - misc - by grovage - United States
Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10990) - you deserved it (37146) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8384) - you deserved it (25847)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6400) - you deserved it (38564)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I finally built up the courage to confess my love to the girl of my dreams. She turned me down. When I asked her about all the recent receptive behavior toward me, she replied, "I thought it'd be funny." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24010) - you deserved it (1740)
On 04/30/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by HighasaCloud (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I fell asleep during a job interview as it was taking place over the phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6203) - you deserved it (16663)
On 04/30/2012 at 9:28am - work - by jobless (woman) - United States
Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9618) - you deserved it (16246)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:24am - work - by zomg - United States (Florida)
Today, after a lot of begging, I finally convinced my husband to shave all of his pubes off. Now I can't even look at it without laughing, and he's mad at me for making him do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4178) - you deserved it (33308)
On 04/30/2012 at 4:25am - intimacy - by kdehshaden (woman) - United States
Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25436) - you deserved it (1347)
On 04/28/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by Steve - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15958) - you deserved it (6146)
On 04/28/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. After she left, they told me they disapprove of her because of her supposedly lower social class. Now I have to either dump her or lose the money they set aside to pay for my university tuition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26023) - you deserved it (2212)
On 04/27/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22085) - you deserved it (2560)
On 04/26/2012 at 10:43am - love - by Aus (woman) - United States
Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19689) - you deserved it (1208)
On 04/26/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Diffy - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17241) - you deserved it (1280)
On 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm - work - by A Henderson (man) - United States
Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6343) - you deserved it (44993)
On 04/24/2012 at 4:29am - work - by xharmonyx - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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