Insanityconfined

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Insanityconfined

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InsanityconfinedInsanityconfined
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2298
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Insanityconfined : What's a profile?

Insanityconfined's page activity

Visits<b>cutycat136</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 11:11am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:20am<b>Mindset</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 9:34pm<b>bellles</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 7:34pm<b>Nordrag</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 9:22pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 1:07am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 2:38am<b>ironfey</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 4:04pm<b>meowimmakat</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 4:55am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 12:07am<b>neonberries</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 4:31pm<b>max367</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 11:17am<b>speechprincess</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 2:37am<b>Unionbay47</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 4:41pm<b>kat_a_tak</b> - the 10/03/2012 at 5:35pm

Insanityconfined's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Insanityconfined's badges

Insanityconfined's favorite FMLs

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

by usadisvet / 04/02/2015 at 2:43am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, I was awoken by the sound of my pet lizard eating my other pet lizard. FML

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

by cat lady / 08/30/2014 at 7:56am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals

Today, I held the door open for a woman and her kids on my way out of the bank. She started accusing me of patronizing her, and when I just let go of the door in protest, she deliberately leaned in so it hit her in the face. I felt the glares from the entire bank as she pretended to cry. FML

by notadoorman / 07/25/2014 at 2:16pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my boss that using a wired connection instead of wifi won't stop his computer from getting viruses. He looked at me, open-mouthed and wide-eyed, like he was a 13-year-old boy and I was a pair of tits. Then he called me clueless and told me to get back to work. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2014 at 6:54pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML

by carebear1228 / 07/01/2014 at 1:31pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm / Spain (Comunidad Valenciana) / Animals

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

by Spooprfailed / 04/08/2014 at 1:32am / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm / United States (Louisiana) / Health

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

by LeaveHimAlone / 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

by clodius / 11/20/2013 at 1:25pm / United Kingdom (North Lanarkshire) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I overcame my stage fright and got up in front of a café audience with my acoustic guitar to sing a few of my songs. Some asshat kept yelling stuff like "NEEDS MORE COWBELL!" and "FREEBIRD!", which made me lose my nerve and flee. FML

by NickDrakeFan / 10/28/2013 at 9:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous