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ImTheAlpha

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ImTheAlpha

6Liked!

ImTheAlphaImTheAlpha
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7115
  • Number of comments : 556
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About ImTheAlpha : 1 l1k3 5h339 4nd 57uff 🐑. Looks like a dude (for the most part. My hair is too fabulous!). Likes Industrial, Punk, and Goth fashion and music. Doesn't understand the elitist attitude, though. Likes (and hates) politics. Likes anime. And Twitch Plays Pokemon. And Homestuck for some reason. Combat Boots are love. Cyberpunk is life. Has a deviantart account and is scarred for life by what has been found there. Will occasionally refer to oneself as oneself and use archaic words. My mom never taught me which words are still in use. Is an asthmatic hallucinating biohazard. message me if you wanna talk, I don't bite people I don't know. I'm so booooorrrreeeeeddd notice me senpai I HAVE SUCCEEDED AT GETTING MODERATED look at all the profile pictures! :33 I congratulate those who get this far.

ImTheAlpha's page activity

Visits<b>coppersmith</b> - 8 hours ago<b>homesuckfucker</b> - 12 hours ago<b>poncho55</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 1:42pm<b>invadermaythe1st</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:10am<b>hardesty</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:12pm<b>KitchKraft</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 4:44pm<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 2:56am<b>Aquaman911</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 1:16pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:11pm<b>TheFuckGiver1230</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 10:09pm<b>J_Fid</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 9:14pm<b>cnguyen32500</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 8:54pm<b>niccoled</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 8:07pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 7:09pm<b>bonnniej</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:48pm<b>jamie_elocin</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:23pm<b>Terrynics</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 5:34pm<b>iPixiee</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 3:54am

Liked!<b>poncho55</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 7:44pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 4:56am<b>calvo_07</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 10:50pm<b>Live4funny</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 6:42am<b>nightfire2258</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 4:29am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:13am

ImTheAlpha's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of ImTheAlpha's badges

ImTheAlpha's favorite FMLs

Today, I am still finding glitter in my ass crack after a concert last night that had a confetti cannon. Thanks Marilyn Manson, I feel so metal now. FML

#21363653
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23865) - you deserved it (4902)

On 02/25/2015 at 11:21pm - misc - by fredi - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML

#21361518
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32392) - you deserved it (2826)

On 02/23/2015 at 2:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML

#21346273
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27340) - you deserved it (1925)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:00pm - health - by ThatWasntFun - United States (Florida)

Today, all day, in a huge blizzard, I've been stuck with a very nice, but very ugly, toothless and rather large and somewhat smelly woman, who has been continuously saying, "It feels like we're dating. Doesn't it feel like we're dating?" Ugh. No, no it doesn't. And please don't kill me. FML

#21344628
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23935) - you deserved it (2364)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:19pm - misc - by Yellow an (man) - United States

Today, I was fired for "blatant, inexcusable racism". My boss had asked me which website background I preferred for our company, and I said that white backgrounds are usually best. He thinks that I believe in white supremacy, and that's bad for the company's image. FML

#21334747
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32036) - you deserved it (2353)

On 01/10/2015 at 10:02pm - work - by Jem (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML

#21333775
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29861) - you deserved it (6111)

On 01/09/2015 at 4:11am - love - by pitytitty (man) - United States (California)

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

#21327404
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26642) - you deserved it (15610)

On 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm - work - by smooth - United States

Today, my dad has discovered selfies and my mom has discovered taking pictures of food. Now I'm at a restaurant, suffering through it all and not being able to eat anything until my mom has taken pictures of it. FML

#21324090
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27256) - you deserved it (2174)

On 12/25/2014 at 4:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my family got into a massive argument about whether or not battery-operated toothbrushes are considered electric toothbrushes. Everyone is in their own room and refuses to talk to each other. FML

#21318050
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30369) - you deserved it (3133)

On 12/15/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by thechaos (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36863) - you deserved it (3749)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML

#21313951
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29920) - you deserved it (2286)

On 12/08/2014 at 6:23pm - health - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I'm old enough to be looking at houses to buy, but not old enough to get past the idea that they might be affordable because they're haunted. FML

#21300362
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25427) - you deserved it (5205)

On 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44104) - you deserved it (3856)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

#21290572
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35025) - you deserved it (3896)

On 11/02/2014 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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