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IceCreamMage

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IceCreamMage
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 February 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 934
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About IceCreamMage :
Often times people spam me asking me who I am and if I want to meet up for drinks in some random dodgy place.
I'll be stating now that I won't meet you if your only intent is killing me and desecrating my corpse in some gutter under a bridge.

On the other hand, I'm twenty naow, working part time and studying Japanese at uni. The future is still pretty hazy, but so far all the shots I've called have pretty much come true which leaves me with a few doubts.

I'm a realist. My idealistic ways died out a long time ago when I realised life isn't fair in the least bit.
My music tastes are a bit icky to most, enjoying a variety of things from heavy metal to techno music and various indie bands.

My hair is naturally curly and I never brush it, owing to the lovely nest I call my hair that everyone seems so intent on fondling due to softness.

My MSN is DeliberateAbortion@hotmail.com

IceCreamMage's last visitors

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IceCreamMage's FML badges

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IceCreamMage's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

#20490478
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18310) - you deserved it (30218)

On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

#20486562
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41303) - you deserved it (3134) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML

#20478664
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36212) - you deserved it (1504)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by protoplasm stole my seat (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

#20469621
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28085) - you deserved it (2430)

On 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by maybe dead in a day (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, I walked up sixteen flights of stairs to my room to avoid the lift lines. When I was almost to the top, the fire alarm sounded. FML

#20462640
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24307) - you deserved it (2289)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:02pm - misc - by tired - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

#20458937
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33571) - you deserved it (6515)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, both my brother and sister missed my wedding. She was playing in a Call of Duty tournament, and he got so high that he forgot about the wedding completely. He was my best man. FML

#20458912
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40541) - you deserved it (2332)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:36pm - misc - by What a happy day (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered after 11 months, my girlfriend is finally ready to have sex. I discovered this by walking in on her and one of my friends. FML

#20448085
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49361) - you deserved it (2977)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by finallyready (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

#20444863
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20722) - you deserved it (7095)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, I started charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognized my iPhone as an MP3 player and started playing the audio from the porn video I watched before we left. Everybody heard. FML

#20443608
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8319) - you deserved it (26119)

On 01/05/2013 at 11:16am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML

#20442898
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18733) - you deserved it (3856)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:56pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I went to take a shower. Afterwards, I noticed I'd forgotten to bring a shirt to change into, so I put on a towel and went back to my room, only to witness my 14-year-old brother and a friend smelling my bra, commenting on "how warm it is". FML

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64116) - you deserved it (15785)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

#20407951
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34407) - you deserved it (1898)

On 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by SugarMyBalls (man) - United States (Georgia)



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