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IceCreamMage

Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 2:37pm) | Search for a member

IceCreamMage

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 14 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2516
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About IceCreamMage : Often times people message me asking me who I am and if I want to meet up for drinks in some random, dodgy place.

I'll be stating now that I won't meet you if your only intent is killing me and desecrating my corpse in some gutter under a bridge.

On the other hand, I'm twenty two and working full time as a website designer. I'm in a relationship with an amazing girl and have never been happier.

My music tastes are a bit icky to most, enjoying a variety of things from heavy metal to techno music and various indie bands.

That's about all, folks!

IceCreamMage's page activity

Visits<b>ckirksey</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 11:31pm<b>elibel</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:08pm<b>g9m9brown</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:17pm<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 6:38pm<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 6:40pm<b>drumguy218</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 2:38am<b>LadyQuantum7</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:23am<b>Gingerness23</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 1:03am<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 5:06pm<b>ToriaButtcheek</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 8:49pm<b>_briianna</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 5:00pm<b>fatlemonjefferso</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 7:49pm<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:12pm<b>vegasked</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 11:24pm<b>sarah_bear14</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 12:30am<b>MrHomerSimpson</b> - the 09/20/2011 at 9:52pm<b>Egnar</b> - the 08/16/2011 at 8:41pm

IceCreamMage's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of IceCreamMage's badges

IceCreamMage's favorite FMLs

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41824) - you deserved it (3162)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, after coming home from a two week vacation, my dog was pink, there were beer bottles and used condoms on my bed, and everything was a mess. I asked my sister, who'd been watching over the place, what had happened. She just said "Oops." and hung up. FML

#21246633
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36955) - you deserved it (3249)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by nayahbear24 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

#21246585
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35167) - you deserved it (33830)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, as I got out the shower, my mom walked in to give me a towel, then quickly covered her eyes and said, "Woah, I almost saw your penis. Good things it's ridiculously small." I had friends over, and I'm pretty sure I'll hear about this for at least the next month. FML

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24244) - you deserved it (44597)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35307) - you deserved it (5000)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38788) - you deserved it (23983)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

#21217343
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56408) - you deserved it (41705)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML

#21210956
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55684) - you deserved it (4136)

On 07/16/2014 at 4:09pm - love - by betrayed (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML

#21210892
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51317) - you deserved it (3567)

On 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm - kids - by fuck you, kid (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56894) - you deserved it (7179)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

#21207158
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42362) - you deserved it (7002)

On 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I complained to the train company online. I filled in information and added several photos as evidence. I only realised later that the photos I attached were nudes. FML

#21202786
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23924) - you deserved it (56128)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by anona (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)



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