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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42933) - you deserved it (4389)
On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States
Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML
I agree, your life sucks (20518) - you deserved it (5171)
On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States
Today, I spent 2 hours doing my hair, doing my make-up, and picking out an outfit to meet some men. On chatroulette. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5336) - you deserved it (20348)
On 03/13/2010 at 8:17pm - misc - by leapple (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my three year old nephew was pointing at the TV screen and saying "Uncle, Uncle!" He thought it was me on the screen. It was Rosie O'Donnell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18709) - you deserved it (2525)
On 03/08/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by raidered - United States (California)
Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18526) - you deserved it (2433)
On 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm - misc - by bathroomblunder (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I got stuck in my apartment's garbage chute. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6971) - you deserved it (17877)
On 02/20/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by AwwChute (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I returned home to find that my boyfriend's dog had gotten into the garbage and ripped all my used pads to shreds. There's a trail of Always tatters leading to his dog bed, and blood everywhere. My blood. Oh God. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23363) - you deserved it (1991)
On 02/19/2010 at 3:24am - animals - by OMGraven (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I dressed up, went over to my boyfriend and told him he could do anything he wanted. He said nothing and walked outside. I figured he'd come back in shortly, but when I looked out the window a few minutes later, he was building a snowman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20621) - you deserved it (7735)
On 01/09/2010 at 4:20pm - love - by dollybabe (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24378) - you deserved it (1856)
On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France
Today, my best friend was texting me about her sick dog. She wrote "Do you think she will get better?", so I wrote "I hope she does". It wasn't until later that I realized I accidentally wrote "I hope she dies" instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22110) - you deserved it (6232)
On 01/04/2010 at 10:32pm - animals - by poordog (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was supposed to go to Disneyland with my family, but I woke up with explosive diarrhea. So while they are at the happiest place on Earth, I'm stuck on this toilet left to imagine that the splash from my crap is a splash from splash mountain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21785) - you deserved it (2001)
On 01/04/2010 at 5:20pm - health - by onthetoilet - Sent from mobile version
Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19374) - you deserved it (4836)
On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5176) - you deserved it (39105)
On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22545) - you deserved it (1400)
On 12/25/2009 at 2:25am - misc - by sucks_brah (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I pulled over to help an attractive girl on the highway in the middle of nowhere. When I asked if she needed help she told me she was going to try starting her car one more time. She then started to make fake engine noises and told me that she was good to go and that I should be on my way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27605) - you deserved it (3909)
On 11/30/2009 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
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