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Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22152) - you deserved it (3020)
On 08/25/2011 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Puppy Loverr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30668) - you deserved it (2349)
On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)
Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16297) - you deserved it (29483)
On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (2333)
On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)
Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24429) - you deserved it (6015)
On 08/20/2011 at 10:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22327) - you deserved it (4271)
On 08/19/2011 at 9:40am - intimacy - by nerofirst - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I drunk texted a guy I like. We'd met at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6823) - you deserved it (24997)
On 08/17/2011 at 7:37pm - love - by Username - United States
Today, my boss stopped mid-walk during a conversation about the humidity in our office, after I told him I didn't like the air conditioner on, because I'd rather not be cold and wet, and that I liked it warm and sticky. I knew then he was no longer thinking about the AC. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9142) - you deserved it (22823)
On 08/17/2011 at 9:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (2512)
On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States
Today, my daughter decided to come out to me by leaving a browser window open with the results page of an online "Are you lesbian?" quiz. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20297) - you deserved it (6957)
On 08/15/2011 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by blah (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (3838)
On 08/15/2011 at 2:23am - animals - by Mumbling Mutt101 (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7504) - you deserved it (24605)
On 08/14/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by MC (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20653) - you deserved it (6986)
On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (8537)
On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I learned the hard way that taking a 20 mile bike ride with my boyfriend's family the day after losing my virginity is the worst decision ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31746) - you deserved it (11345)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:58am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Monday 20 May 2013
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