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Hebrewhammers

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Hebrewhammers

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 183
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Hebrewhammers's page activity

Visits<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 12:31pm<b>ArnoD</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 10:31am<b>SAspring</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 10:17am<b>andrew6p</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 2:16pm

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Hebrewhammers's favorite FMLs

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42086) - you deserved it (7881)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53826) - you deserved it (3457)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60524) - you deserved it (20224)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML

#20176506
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21844) - you deserved it (2166)

On 11/24/2012 at 11:35am - misc - by lobstercola - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML

#19701580
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25360) - you deserved it (1614)

On 05/29/2012 at 9:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

#19477663
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24572) - you deserved it (2925)

On 04/16/2012 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, as I turned the shower on, I got covered in gravy. Turns out, my friends had unscrewed the shower head, filled it with gravy granules, then screwed it back on. FML

#19319473
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24657) - you deserved it (2773)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:46am - health - by J Rush - United Kingdom (Powys)

Today, as I was leaving for work, I discovered my neighbor had just passed away. I found out when I came across his body lying in my front yard. FML

#19087811
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30585) - you deserved it (1798)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:53pm - misc - by Jedi2500 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML

#18444451
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11417) - you deserved it (43673)

On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11258) - you deserved it (63273)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, while socializing after a church service, I discovered I'm still referred to as "Fireshit's brother", after an incident a year ago which involved my sister screaming "the devil is coming out of my anus!" from the lavatory. FML

#14330238
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28820) - you deserved it (3124)

On 12/25/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, one of my usually unpleasant managers offered me a slice of cheese cake for doing a good job. I declined, but after some pestering on his part I finally accepted it. I have been violently ill for the past 2 hours. FML

#14279972
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27180) - you deserved it (3363)

On 12/21/2010 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

#7380749
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61548) - you deserved it (7056)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was mowing lawns for my summer job. I noticed next to me a shiny new corvette being washed by the owner. I gave a friendly wave, just as I heard a big clank as the mower blade shot a rock into the side of the car. FML

#4046446
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45830) - you deserved it (4567)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:59am - misc - by ferrin10 - United States (Idaho)



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