About HeXr : People are stupid
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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I was driving my little sister to school. She really didn't wanna go and was throwing a tantrum in the car. When we stopped at a red light, my sister notices a police man giving a ticket to another driver. She rolled down her window and screamed "Help me! I'm being kidnapped by a murderer!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (56899) - you deserved it (2469)
On 08/19/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Amara1717 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I used a public bathroom. I hung my purse up on the hook on the door. Two minutes later, a hand reaches over the door and steals my purse. I got robbed while taking a crap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41249) - you deserved it (5716)
On 07/18/2009 at 6:32pm - misc - by xobeachbabi428ox - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my friend put a bunch of cheetos all over me at the beach while I was taking a nap. Next thing I know I'm being woken up by a bunch of seagulls attacking me. One pooped in my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36500) - you deserved it (3352)
On 07/16/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by kewlcat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36106) - you deserved it (20394)
On 07/11/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by jadakorn (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was working at the gas station. An old lady was watching me fill her gas tank. A really beautiful girl walked by. I lost concentration and overfilled the tank. I quickly pulled it out and squirted the old lady with a bit of petrol. She was smiling and gave a slight moan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41604) - you deserved it (9503)
On 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Fattie (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)
Today, I was babysitting. The kids were thirsty, so I poured them both a cup of the green juice I'd found in a jug in their fridge. They downed it in a flash. It wasn't until later on after I'd poured myself a cup and taken a sip, I realized I had given them margarita mix. The kids are 4 and 2. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11331) - you deserved it (39099)
On 07/05/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by smth (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45465) - you deserved it (17948)
On 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by DutchOven (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my girlfriend and I walked to her couch while kissing with our eyes closed. Stumbling, we reached the couch and dropped our bodies, her on top of me. What I didn't know was that her kitty, Elvis, was napping. Elvis was very angry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31921) - you deserved it (13112)
On 06/29/2009 at 6:59pm - misc - by peace_lost (man) - United States (California)
Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to find and clean the poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34220) - you deserved it (2365)
On 06/26/2009 at 1:43am - work - by donezo (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, while I was working a customer notified me that the men's restroom need some attention. Thinking that there was just a small mess, I walked into the restroom only to discover someone had taken a crap in the sink. Guess who got to clean it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38729) - you deserved it (2020)
On 06/25/2009 at 12:22pm - work - by KP (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, in the shower, a dime fell on my foot. The only place it could have come from? One of my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24850) - you deserved it (60201)
On 06/23/2009 at 10:37pm - health - by FattyMcFatterson (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (182064) - you deserved it (25548)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while laying out, I kept feeling something misty, like a spray bottle. Curious as to what it was since it kept coming, I looked up, only to see the painters were peeing over the side of the house, and the heavy breeze was turning their piss into a refreshing mist for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50334) - you deserved it (2578)
On 06/05/2009 at 3:47pm - misc - by layout (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said "You know? I like little girls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14864) - you deserved it (43422)
On 06/03/2009 at 1:23am - love - by boinger (man) - United States (California)
Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31332) - you deserved it (49311)
On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 17 June 2013
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