Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

HeXr

Offline (the 12/16/2014 at 1:50am) | Search for a member

HeXr

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9710
  • Number of comments : 381
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About HeXr : People are stupid

HeXr's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 11:49pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 6:04am<b>Jclan_91419</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 3:19am<b>barneyAU</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 6:20pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 2:08pm<b>pjpeej13</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 4:00pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:44pm<b>bluehero</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 10:35am<b>KissMyButtocks</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 12:30am<b>anormalperson</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 2:18am<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 10:10pm<b>mattlw</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 4:13pm<b>Porcei</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 2:19am<b>ThatLooksSticky</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 2:19pm<b>catkat1988</b> - the 01/23/2012 at 6:38am<b>silent_bride</b> - the 12/09/2011 at 2:09pm<b>ikickgingers</b> - the 12/02/2011 at 11:36am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:50pm

HeXr's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of HeXr's badges

HeXr's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

#19085397
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26444) - you deserved it (1958)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by jess (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

#19085397
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26444) - you deserved it (1958)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by jess (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, someone peed in my physical education locker. The only way someone could've done it is with a ladder. I'm so popular it hurts. FML

#19084261
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25429) - you deserved it (4741)

On 02/15/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was at work, my boyfriend decided to give my Cocker Spaniel a haircut. I now have the equivalent of an over-sized naked mole rat running around my house. FML

#19083975
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20137) - you deserved it (2528)

On 02/15/2012 at 6:09am - animals - by workaholic (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to chase my naked brothers around my house for twenty minutes, trying to get them to take a bath, all while they were chasing my best friend around yelling, "IT'S WIENER TIME!" FML

#19076647
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23943) - you deserved it (2468)

On 02/14/2012 at 5:29pm - kids - by ShylaMarie - Canada

Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to take a dump out of a second-story window is a very bad idea. FML

#19069104
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5805) - you deserved it (36604)

On 02/13/2012 at 9:55pm - misc - by michael (man) - United States

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

#19067640
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27217) - you deserved it (3956)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sent out a text saying "Smile! You're beautiful and don't let anyone tell you otherwise." to most of my contacts. I got one reply, from my best friend, saying, "Are you fucking stupid?" FML

#19064637
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12098) - you deserved it (32836)

On 02/13/2012 at 11:27am - misc - by dis_bee_leaf (woman) - Canada

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

#19059708
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27924) - you deserved it (2109)

On 02/12/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8768) - you deserved it (66198)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I was working at my day-camp, and one of my little boys told me he had to show me something important. He proudly showed me that he'd crapped his pants. I had to wipe his ass clean. FML

#19039920
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22945) - you deserved it (2884)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:51am - kids - by ilana (woman) - United States

Today, my husband started a food fight. During our wedding reception. FML

#19033421
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28505) - you deserved it (5557)

On 02/09/2012 at 10:17am - love - by Zoey (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after I spent nearly three hours building an igloo, my dog decided it would be a nice to enter it and take a shit. FML

#19032075
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24203) - you deserved it (3623)

On 02/09/2012 at 1:37am - animals - by A (woman) - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: