About HeXr : People are stupid
Socialite
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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29724) - you deserved it (8016)
On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -
Today, a man dressed as Santa Claus walked by me, grabbing my butt. He smelled of pipe tobacco and pee. He pulled me close to him and whispered, "I bet you're naughty but you feel so nice." I looked dumbfounded at him as he winked and yelled, "You're on my list." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31061) - you deserved it (2976)
On 12/15/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML
I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (8036)
On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (83273) - you deserved it (3856)
On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I got a phone call from a friend, who lives in the same neighbourhood as me, wondering if it was my father she saw walking a dog by her house, wearing only his boxers. It was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17591) - you deserved it (1432)
On 12/07/2010 at 5:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Ostfold)
Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22216) - you deserved it (1575)
On 12/06/2010 at 11:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend of two years called me on Skype while he was taking a crap. Think it's a sign that maybe we've been dating for too long. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17959) - you deserved it (3773)
On 12/05/2010 at 1:35am - love - by fail (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to a very crowded restaurant. Being really shy, I requested to sit in the corner, but instead they placed me in the center of the dinning area. I started to eat my food and got really spaced out. Suddenly I sneeze-farted and everyone turned to look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21090) - you deserved it (5973)
On 11/28/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I told my husband that I wanted to take advantage of the alone time we would have while our kids are visiting my parents. My idea? A nice dinner out and kinky sex all night long. His idea? Chinese buffet and subsequent dutch ovens in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19061) - you deserved it (2951)
On 11/22/2010 at 5:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my mother was over visiting. My three year old ran out of my room chasing the cat with his toy. He smacked the cat with it, the cat scratched him, he dropped it and ran away. I was busy with the baby so I asked my mom to take the toy away. She walked back holding my pink dildo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19614) - you deserved it (9362)
On 11/17/2010 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by bottomdrawerraider (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I thought my house was being broken into in the dead of night. Frightened, I dismounted a floor lamp as a make-shift weapon and crept through the house, channelling my inner Ellen Ripley. It turned out to be the wireless printer with a paper jam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12817) - you deserved it (4674)
Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22535) - you deserved it (1881)
On 11/13/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by tmac05 - United States (California)
Today, at work, my manager fell in front of an entire lobby full of people on a wet floor. I'm the only one who burst out laughing. Turns out she has a broken arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6937) - you deserved it (22723)
On 11/12/2010 at 11:10pm - work - by klm878 - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32174) - you deserved it (5485)
On 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44513) - you deserved it (8402)
On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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