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HeXr

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HeXr
  • Town/Country : Oakville, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5371
  • Number of comments : 381
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About HeXr : People are stupid

HeXr's last visitors

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HeXr's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9356) - you deserved it (32983)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I told a patient that we needed to collect a stool sample. I left the room momentarily to retrieve what the patient would need. He apparently didn't need anything besides the counter in the exam room. FML

#19951695
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18754) - you deserved it (1776)

On 07/17/2012 at 8:54pm - work - by TimeForACareerChange (man) - United States

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

#19928978
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31157) - you deserved it (2626)

On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I discovered I'd left my coffee on top of my car when it fell through the sun roof whilst I was driving, showering me. FML

#19927767
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11593) - you deserved it (21978)

On 07/12/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by hot coffee - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

#19917515
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12501) - you deserved it (23727)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML

#19894625
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18385) - you deserved it (1716)

On 07/05/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

#19873141
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16175) - you deserved it (1906)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm - misc - by pissed off -

Today, while at work, I witnessed a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said "yep... that just happened" and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML

#19867742
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18658) - you deserved it (2298)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:12pm - kids - by ihatewalmart (man) - United States

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16458) - you deserved it (4525)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my friend over the phone that I had to go drop the kids off at the pool. She told me that she didn't need to know about my bathroom habits and hung up on me. I really had to take my children to the local swimming pool for swim lessons. FML

#19844489
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16531) - you deserved it (1769)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML

#19827814
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19075) - you deserved it (2780)

On 06/22/2012 at 3:28am - work - by me - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML

#19820234
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20291) - you deserved it (2694)

On 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was so out of it from a lack of sleep and an accidental antihistamine overdose, I tried to offer my cat a cup of tea, and actually got pissed off when he didn't reply. It took me a good five minutes to understand what just happened. FML

#19817936
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20011) - you deserved it (5500)

On 06/20/2012 at 10:09am - animals - by anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35077) - you deserved it (3815)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML

#19792340
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21133) - you deserved it (3616)

On 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)



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