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HeXr

Offline (the 03/02/2015 at 12:31am) | Search for a member

HeXr

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12603
  • Number of comments : 381
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About HeXr : People are stupid

HeXr's page activity

Visits<b>amourmourant</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:50am<b>DonkeyTeeth2013</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:43pm<b>DavidaimeRS</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:48pm<b>Cortezthe1st</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 9:03pm<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 10:19pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 11:49pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 6:04am<b>Jclan_91419</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 3:19am<b>barneyAU</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 6:20pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 2:08pm<b>pjpeej13</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 4:00pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:44pm<b>bluehero</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 10:35am<b>KissMyButtocks</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 12:30am<b>anormalperson</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 2:18am<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 10:10pm<b>mattlw</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 4:13pm<b>Porcei</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 2:19am

HeXr's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of HeXr's badges

HeXr's favorite FMLs

Today, my shoe fell apart a few minutes after I got to work. I called my boyfriend and asked him to bring me the "pretty black pair" in my closet. What did he bring? Black stilettos. I'm a waitress with an eight hour shift. FML

#20756560
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33834) - you deserved it (28792)

On 06/30/2013 at 7:00pm - work - by readytoamputatemyfeet (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50338) - you deserved it (3274)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

#20752893
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50000) - you deserved it (5750)

On 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm - work - by DocKreso (man) - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)

Today, I used a public restroom. I saw my sister's shoes walk into the stall next to me, so I gave her a little nudge with my foot. We then nudged each other until I walked out and saw a homeless man with the same shoes as my sister. He then tried to hold my hand. FML

#20745749
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26085) - you deserved it (40518)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81003) - you deserved it (7388)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy; I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off all eyes turned to me. FML

#20731175
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42509) - you deserved it (13908)

On 06/17/2013 at 9:55am - health - by nomwar (woman) - United States

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

#20723415
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47698) - you deserved it (3168)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61131) - you deserved it (13837)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

#20708003
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53527) - you deserved it (4057)

On 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML

#20707362
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51132) - you deserved it (4700)

On 06/05/2013 at 11:08am - misc - by Thanks Honey (woman) - United States

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

#20694826
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48554) - you deserved it (4107)

On 05/30/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by windshitwipers (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML

#20692945
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46734) - you deserved it (3461)

On 05/29/2013 at 11:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML

#20684818
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45827) - you deserved it (8374)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:37am - kids - by Laurel (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45533) - you deserved it (4827)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

#20667353
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52024) - you deserved it (8940)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

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