About Goldenchest : Not many people appreciate bowties and fezzes as much as I do.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I was on a crowded bus when the woman behind me vomited. The guy next to her was a sympathy puker. So were 3 other people. There was no room to escape. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22438) - you deserved it (1106)
On 12/14/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by MiscHats (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22318) - you deserved it (7072)
On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while my mother was driving me to school, her coffee started to spill. So like a normal parent, she held it over my lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18293) - you deserved it (1191)
On 12/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31123) - you deserved it (1604)
On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16301) - you deserved it (1253)
On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I had to create a perfect society in English class; the best society has their grade go up a full letter. After tons of preparation and thinking, I lost to an island made only of cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15372) - you deserved it (1290)
On 12/11/2012 at 6:03pm - misc - by JPPUDLY (man) - United States (California)
Today, I had to get to class at 9:00 to take a test. I woke up at 6:00, and figured I could wait a few minutes before getting ready. The next thing I knew, it was 10:30. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15943) - you deserved it (13904)
On 12/11/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my roommate turned the thermostat down to 50 degrees. Why? Because she read that shivering burns calories. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16794) - you deserved it (1122)
On 12/11/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19356) - you deserved it (4300)
On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)
Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19095) - you deserved it (4159)
On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)
Today, feeling very distant to my daughter recently, I decided to sneak a peek in her diary to see what was on her mind. The book was apparently one of those that play the sound of a woman screaming when opened improperly, and alerted everyone in the house to my actions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3504) - you deserved it (37953)
On 12/08/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3753) - you deserved it (63132)
On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I dutifully attended my husband's local gig at a coffee shop. I thus found out, through song, about my husband's affair, in front of about 100 people. All of whom we both know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22886) - you deserved it (1324)
On 12/05/2012 at 12:35am - love - by musiciansareoneofakind (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17334) - you deserved it (1283)
On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)
Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17411) - you deserved it (1018)
On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
