Goldenchest

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Offline (the 01/27/2015 at 5:22pm)

Goldenchest

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 August 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 26946
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Goldenchest : Not many people appreciate bowties and fezzes as much as I do.

Goldenchest's page activity

Visits<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 4:25am<b>BlackRosey_</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 10:04am<b>rydersmomma16</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 12:19am<b>CravenCat</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 12:05pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 7:52pm<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 3:00pm<b>predator76x</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 5:38pm<b>VGaray</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 11:26pm<b>Sizly</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 7:02am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:28pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 5:45am<b>matuf</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 5:19pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 2:05am<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 3:01pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 4:09pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 6:30am<b>benjweaver</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 7:34pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 1:27am

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Goldenchest's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving along when I noticed a kid struggling to push his car up the crest of a hill. I jumped out to help him, and he acted surprised to see me. Once we got the car over the hill, it rolled on down. I then saw that no one was actually in the driver's seat. I'd helped a vandal. FML

Today, my boyfriend admitted to subtly encouraging me to do stupid things because he finds my "bimbo moments" hilarious. FML

by a2 / 02/06/2014 at 1:57am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, after years of counseling and therapy for my anger issues, I snapped. Two words: Flappy Bird. FML

Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML

by Evolution mama / 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm / Iceland (Gullbringusysla) / Kids

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2014 at 8:03pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

by Lithiac / 02/04/2014 at 1:16am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to wake up at 4am because my boss set an important business meeting for first thing in the morning. After making sure everything was ready, I went to work. My boss ended up oversleeping and moved the meeting to tomorrow. FML

Today, my husband and I are sick. He keeps whining about how bad he feels. I'm just as sick, as well as 7 months pregnant. I've not only been taking care of his whiny ass: I've cooked, cleaned, and gone to the store several times because the tissues we had were too rough on his nose. FML

by AnonWife / 01/21/2014 at 8:16pm / United Kingdom (North Lincolnshire) / Health

Today, at work, a kid rushed into the bathroom to vomit. Understandable, except he threw up into the sinks. Sinks plural, whose drain holes are so small that only liquid can really pass through. Guess who had to clean up vomit chunks. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2014 at 2:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, someone thought it would be funny to steal the precious stuffed bear I've had since childhood and leave a ransom note in its place. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2014 at 5:21pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new calculus teacher taught everything using nothing but soccer terms and analogies, just so the resident idiot meatheads would understand. I didn't learn a thing. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2014 at 1:38pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

by Fire sucks. / 01/16/2014 at 10:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that "old people are allowed to tell the truth". FML

by Pop / 01/14/2014 at 9:38pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, after trying for several days to change some details on the social security website, I got fed up and called them. I waited nearly two hours on hold, and when I finally got through, the guy on the other end just told me to reboot my computer and try again, then hung up on me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2014 at 4:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife told my 7-year-old son that he looks just like me. He began crying and said, "I don't want to be ugly like him." FML

by -_- / 01/12/2014 at 3:03am / United States / Kids