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Goldenchest

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Goldenchest
  • Town/Country : Florence, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 August 1996 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 5199
  • Number of comments : 133
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Goldenchest : Not many people appreciate bowties and fezzes as much as I do.

Goldenchest's last visitors

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Goldenchest's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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Goldenchest's favorite FMLs

Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39627) - you deserved it (3949)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I received a slip through my door saying that the package I'd ordered couldn't be delivered today because no-one was home to sign for it. I got the slip just in time to watch the guy who put it through my letterbox get in his van, look me in the eye and drive off. FML

#20670426
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42344) - you deserved it (2980)

On 05/18/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by JACKxRAWR (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML

#20670402
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43421) - you deserved it (4273)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43210) - you deserved it (2799)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML

#20664518
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44513) - you deserved it (3229)

On 05/15/2013 at 2:43am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after coming home from school, I found that two birds have made a nest above the porch light. This wouldn't be a problem if they stopped attacking me every time I get within 5 feet of them. FML

#20663096
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32541) - you deserved it (2824)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:11pm - animals - by Locked Out - United States

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

#20662624
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50507) - you deserved it (3303)

On 05/14/2013 at 8:03am - health - by toothache - United States (Illinois)

Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML

#20661106
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41877) - you deserved it (2392)

On 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by culodegrillo (woman) - Spain

Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML

#20661009
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37809) - you deserved it (2457)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML

#20656960
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47045) - you deserved it (7656)

On 05/11/2013 at 7:04pm - love - by wrongguy - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my parents scoured my browser history, certain that I have a hidden Facebook account that I'm using to get up to no good. Their reasoning was that there's no way my only friends are my relatives and that all I can post about is about the weather. FML

#20655587
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36384) - you deserved it (6085)

On 05/11/2013 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to therapy. I started talking about my childhood and my life. By the time the session was over my therapist was crying. FML

#20651461
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54207) - you deserved it (3106)

On 05/09/2013 at 1:30am - health - by Screwed Up (man) - United States

Today, I was leaving my doctor's appointment when a nurse stopped me. She exclaimed, "Wow you are so skinny! What's your secret?" My secret? Having an autoimmune disease. FML



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