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Goldenchest

Offline (the 11/17/2014 at 12:14am) | Search for a member

Goldenchest

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13529
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Goldenchest : Not many people appreciate bowties and fezzes as much as I do.

Goldenchest's page activity

Visits<b>BBlah</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 4:09pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 6:30am<b>benjweaver</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 7:34pm<b>oops6663</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 1:27am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:08am<b>AE101</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 7:58pm<b>buttercup72</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 2:14am<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 6:54pm<b>datfacedoe</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 5:04am<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 2:53pm<b>Big_Pickle</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 1:30pm<b>skatergurl1469</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 12:18am<b>DawnofDark</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 12:29pm<b>iOceanus</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:20am<b>Rallred32</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 8:56am<b>TheGingerLady</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 9:26pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 10:15pm<b>ChelzTheWolfGirl</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 5:50am

Goldenchest's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Goldenchest's badges

Goldenchest's favorite FMLs

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

#21088206
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42218) - you deserved it (3759)

On 03/16/2014 at 2:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my neighbours that I wasn't "watching porn" earlier, and that I was honestly just watching an episode of Game of Thrones. FML

Today, I had the cops called on me for acting suspiciously. I was using a payphone. FML

#21086220
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40277) - you deserved it (3648)

On 03/14/2014 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39954) - you deserved it (8173) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46212) - you deserved it (6779)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML

#21081555
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42521) - you deserved it (4263)

On 03/08/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML

#21080782
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43870) - you deserved it (6309)

On 03/07/2014 at 8:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my hippy nutjob of a roommate threw a bitch fit at me, all because he saw me chopping down a tree in Minecraft. FML

#21080644
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43007) - you deserved it (4696)

On 03/07/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by fuck off, eh! (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a woman attempted to pickpocket me while trying to educate me about God. FML

Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last 2 miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML

#21078597
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65129) - you deserved it (5123)

On 03/05/2014 at 7:33am - health - by rolypoly (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

#21076106
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52469) - you deserved it (13366)

On 03/02/2014 at 5:38pm - animals - by Anonytard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after paying at the gas station, the cashier stuck out her hand, which was clenched into a fist. I thought she wanted a fist-bump, so I gave her one. She just stared back at me. Turns out she was just trying to give me my change. FML

#21075108
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36693) - you deserved it (14716)

On 03/01/2014 at 4:09pm - money - by SarahNB - United States (Utah)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42851) - you deserved it (5437)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

#21068594
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41918) - you deserved it (3937)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I watched my brother attempt to cook some eggs without turning the gas on. FML

#21066280
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37856) - you deserved it (4652)

On 02/20/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)



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