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Gioia221

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Gioia221

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 300
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Gioia221's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that if you make fun of a man for walking with a cane, you'd better be ready for him to hit you with it. FML

#5912025
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6854) - you deserved it (147936)

On 10/20/2009 at 12:05pm - misc - by stick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized that my company's calendar is synchronized throughout the whole building. The entire company now knows that I made love to my wife last Wednesday and Friday, and that I went out with a girl named Janet on Saturday. My wife's name is Julie, and she works in the same building. FML

#3256249
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10861) - you deserved it (162430)

On 06/26/2009 at 9:32pm - work - by Fred (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17921) - you deserved it (140048)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
434 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31914) - you deserved it (141228)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML

#1600117
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20936) - you deserved it (127569)

On 05/03/2009 at 5:05pm - misc - by htothecr (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML

#1387325
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23530) - you deserved it (119691)

On 04/27/2009 at 9:51am - intimacy - by BARF (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I bought a brand new flat screen TV. When I brought it home it didn't work. Furious, I walked into Best Buy and yelled at a guy in a tucked in blue polo and khakis. I asked him why it didn't work and he said he didn't know. I kept screaming. He didn't have a nametag. He didn't work there. FML

#1101827
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11723) - you deserved it (115532)

On 04/18/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by asdfghjkl (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML

#1080598
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29042) - you deserved it (104399)

On 04/18/2009 at 6:42am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML

#1018681
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14681) - you deserved it (124805)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29544) - you deserved it (110480)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

#448904
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30709) - you deserved it (136641)

On 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by Melaknee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a letter saying I was no longer a student at my college and my current work is void since I had ignored and refused to pay my tuition bill. Over the past month I've been deleting these pesky emails saying 'FINAL WARNING regarding payment' thinking it was more spam. They weren't. FML

#312852
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27308) - you deserved it (125939)

On 03/13/2009 at 10:57pm - money - by goddamnit (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I tried to prove to my dad that he snores by secretly putting a tape recorder under his bed. I soon found out my parents had sex that night. Apparently, my mom likes to talk dirty. FML

#272262
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33761) - you deserved it (89963)

On 03/11/2009 at 2:57pm - intimacy - by Zack (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)



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