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Giftig

Offline (the 12/16/2014 at 8:21pm) | Search for a member

Giftig

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 February 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2862
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Giftig's page activity

Visits<b>super3286</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 9:06am<b>JAvolt</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 10:59pm<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 5:37pm<b>Niedermayer_20</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 3:13pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:58am<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 3:32am<b>thatguy240</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:28pm<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:30pm<b>jamsdean</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:22am<b>Bluebl4ze</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 5:54am<b>therealjc</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:01pm<b>GrungeGeek17</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 3:23pm<b>razi1</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 5:44am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:36pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:47pm<b>bkinns</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 9:38am<b>YellowKettleBell</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 6:51am<b>Straya_for_life</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 2:14pm

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Giftig's favorite FMLs

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52451) - you deserved it (4608)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37812) - you deserved it (20071)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37812) - you deserved it (20071)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37812) - you deserved it (20071)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

#21122879
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32653) - you deserved it (12789)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a visit to my grandma. We ended up playing Scrabble. In between passing wind that smelled like rotting eggs, she kept playing the filthiest words she could, and yelled at me whenever I checked to see if they were in the Scrabble dictionary. FML

#21118282
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35798) - you deserved it (4677)

On 04/20/2014 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - Slovenia (Domzale Commune)

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41610) - you deserved it (6673)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46029) - you deserved it (5953)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

#21111156
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36107) - you deserved it (8469)

On 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML

#21099560
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41349) - you deserved it (17800)

On 03/29/2014 at 5:57pm - love - by the other guy? (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

#21097985
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43551) - you deserved it (6511)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39969) - you deserved it (8175) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48038) - you deserved it (9563)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41467) - you deserved it (12511)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)



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