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Giftig

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Giftig

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 February 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2341
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Giftig's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:58am<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 3:32am<b>thatguy240</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 9:28pm<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:30pm<b>jamsdean</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:22am<b>Bluebl4ze</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 5:54am<b>therealjc</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 11:01pm<b>GrungeGeek17</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 3:23pm<b>razi1</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 5:44am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:36pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:47pm<b>bkinns</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 9:38am<b>YellowKettleBell</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 6:51am<b>Straya_for_life</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 2:14pm<b>Genesis2point0</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 9:01am<b>cesar_caf</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 3:08pm<b>Just_Ajay</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 4:40pm<b>ilovecuddling</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 3:20pm

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Giftig's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML

#21252533
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15446) - you deserved it (35430)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40589) - you deserved it (7752)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40574) - you deserved it (9445)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40402) - you deserved it (8312) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46261) - you deserved it (14232)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42912) - you deserved it (6125)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52356) - you deserved it (4606)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37725) - you deserved it (20044)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37725) - you deserved it (20044)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37725) - you deserved it (20044)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

#21122879
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32100) - you deserved it (12542)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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