GOLD3NxWARRIOR

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GOLD3NxWARRIOR

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16942
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About GOLD3NxWARRIOR : Life will knock you down, but it's not about whether you get up- it's about the experience that you have learned from it.

GOLD3NxWARRIOR's page activity

Visits<b>jordi55</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 3:13am<b>islandkid3</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 3:06pm<b>mlc4664</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:34pm<b>tiny1972</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 10:50pm<b>HighasaCloud</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:28am<b>Lunab123</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:10am<b>drayloon</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 12:21am<b>German_97</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 6:20pm<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 10:37am<b>VeganDarkLight</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 3:53am<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 8:11am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 8:48pm<b>fistingeggplant</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:05am<b>mmmmKatie</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 10:53pm<b>colby6666</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 10:49pm<b>OnePLAN</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:52pm<b>camimarvez1</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 11:53am<b>savygirl367</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 8:43pm

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GOLD3NxWARRIOR's favorite FMLs

Today, I want on a date with a man I met on the internet. While talking over drinks, I asked him what he did for a living. He said he was a salesman, and that he's really good at it. Interested, I asked him what it was he sold. "Cannabis." FML

by socksxox / 05/02/2016 at 5:19pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the play I was directing opened. The curtain opened, and my lead actor and actress weren't prepared. I could tell from the looks on their faces as the whole audience saw him balls deep in her, doggy style, on stage. FML

by headinabag33 / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with the guy I like. He couldn't get it up and awkwardly tried to stick his limp penis in. FML

by myusofwe / 02/05/2016 at 8:33pm / Puerto Rico / Intimacy

Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 11:35am / United States (Kansas) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend made a patronising post on Facebook, "to all you guys out there" saying how having sex with a drunk person is straight-up, 100% rape. I pointed out that she's had sex with me several times after I've come home drunk. That pissed her off. Now I'm single. FML

by 404: Sanity Not Found / 01/27/2016 at 10:35am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, a customer scared me for the sole purpose of watching my breasts jiggle when I jumped in surprise. I know because his head moved as they did, and he said, "Nice." before walking away. FML

by NotYourToy / 01/27/2016 at 2:59am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I found the engagement ring I'd bought and been missing for a week. On my girlfriend's hand. While my childhood friend was inside her. They apparently like pretending she's married while doing this. They made this self-discovery a week ago. Good for them. I don't want the ring back. FML

Today, I walked in on my 13-year-old sister cutting her pubic hair with scissors. After a long talk about what on earth she was doing, she confessed to doing it so her boyfriend could find her clitoris. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2015 at 12:40am / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, I went to the bowling alley. I have short, stubby fingers, and as I looked for a bowling ball that would fit my hand properly, an old man watched me searching, and approached asking, "Is that how you are with women? Fingering them, tossing them in the gutter, and looking for another?" FML

by weldingmachine217 / 11/16/2015 at 4:47pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, a 60 year old veteran hit on me by pointing to his white hair and saying: "Just because there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire down below." Then he told me vets eat free at Cracker Barrel. FML

Today, while working at a wedding reception, I caught a couple getting touchy in the back of the room, but I swept it under the rug. Apparently, they didn't like getting caught, and reported me to my boss, claiming sexual harassment. I now have to attend social sensitivity training once a week. FML

by teenagesyndrome / 09/06/2015 at 2:33pm / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend was putting baby powder on my bare ass, when his dad walked into the room, casually set a laundry basket next to the bed, and walked out like nothing happened. FML

by ManderDander / 09/05/2015 at 2:48pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2015 at 4:51pm / United States / Kids

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, my 14 year old brother and 9 year old sister were fighting. My brother said "You suck!" to my sister, and she replied with "You swallow!" FML