Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

GDragon29

Search for a member

GDragon29

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 6 October 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 497
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

GDragon29's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

GDragon29's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my husband to watch our daughter while I ran a few errands. While he treated himself to a long nap, she decided our fish needed a bubble bath, and squeezed out an entire bottle of dish soap. I came home to bubbles all over the floor, five dead fish, and one sleeping husband. FML

#20088451
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23189) - you deserved it (2584)

On 09/25/2012 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

#20087243
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15656) - you deserved it (29316)

On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States

Today, I was taking a pizza order at work, and had to ask the customer's name. I couldn't quite hear what he said, so rather than asking him to repeat himself, I asked how it was spelled. He gave me a funny look and said, "Um, A.J.?" FML

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he says, "There's too much of an age gap between us" and that it makes him "feel like a pedophile". He's only four months older than I am. FML

#20086279
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24626) - you deserved it (1687)

On 09/24/2012 at 4:15am - love - by Alright. (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, a very attractive man asked me out. I'd have been flattered if I weren't the nurse assigned to his laboring wife. FML

#20086071
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23770) - you deserved it (1390)

On 09/24/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by Hello Nurse (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my parents changed the code on our alarm system while they were out of town. The police could not verify I was their son, despite spending hours trying to get hold of them. They thought it was just another telemarketer. FML

#20085837
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19382) - you deserved it (1222)

On 09/23/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to Waffle House to talk to the manager about getting a job. My boyfriend now wants to beat up the manager for giving me his number so that I can call him whenever I'm done filling in the application. FML

#20085651
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16592) - you deserved it (2878)

On 09/23/2012 at 8:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was scheduled for an interview at a local firm owned by two partners. The secretary told me to be there at around 12:00 to 12:30 pm, so I arrived at 12:15. The first boss told me off for being early, the other one yelled at me for being late. FML

#20084697
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21502) - you deserved it (2126)

On 09/23/2012 at 5:23am - work - by whatisthisidonteven (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

#20083631
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20917) - you deserved it (8835)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

#20083358
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20399) - you deserved it (3008)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:12am - animals - by Grauncho - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

#20083352
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25196) - you deserved it (25535)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:06am - intimacy - by holyshitbatman - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML

#20082214
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20905) - you deserved it (4110)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after completely refilling my almost empty gas tank, I witnessed the price flip from $3.69 per gallon to $3.59. FML

#20082194
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24604) - you deserved it (2181)

On 09/21/2012 at 2:49pm - money - by The Drew - United States

Today, while at work, I helped my ex-husband pick out a ring for the girl he cheated on me with. FML

#20082014
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30665) - you deserved it (6347)

On 09/21/2012 at 11:11am - love - by Sad ex-wife (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML

#20081849
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26862) - you deserved it (3123)

On 09/21/2012 at 6:57am - work - by scarred for life - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: