About FunkyAndFresh : I iz crazy?!
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FunkyAndFresh's favorite FMLs
Today, we were going to Disney World all the way from North Carolina. After 12 hours of driving, my kids started fighting and complaining. My husband finally said, "If I hear you guys one more time we're turning around and going back home." They annoyed him once again, and we actually went home. FML
by jaimie / 03/19/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, I was paired up with a partner in my film class. He has an idea for a film: "Shoot an onion from all angles, light it on fire, and roll it down a hill". He was dead serious. I'm stuck with this guy for the whole year. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was "I farted". Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, while walking past a homeless man, I heard him comment on the woman in front of me saying, "I should come to this side of town more often, there's some hotties here." Then he saw me and said, "Wait, no, I think I'll stay on the other side of town." FML
by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 8:49pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML
by chi-huaHUA / 12/04/2010 at 2:08am / United States / Animals
Today, my sixteen year old son told me that he's following his guidance counselor's advice: to do what his hero does for a living. The problem? His hero is SpongeBob Squarepants. His ambition in life is to become a fry cook. FML
by Anonymous / 11/07/2010 at 3:15pm / Canada (Quebec) / Kids
by mr_p / 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at my friend's house, I decided to climb up on a shelf and pounce on him when he came back downstairs. When I heard someone coming, I assumed it was him and pounced. It was his grandma carrying the laundry. FML
by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 11:06am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I have a busy day of college work ahead of me. I figured I'd best have a good breakfast. Then I realised I'd completely ran out of food except for various types of sauces and condiments. So what am I having for breakfast today? That's right. A nice cup of Gravy. FML
by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 2:24am / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Miscellaneous
by blah blah daddy / 10/02/2010 at 7:08pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I finally decided to do regular biology rather than honors biology, thinking honors would be too hard. My first day in regular biology, my lab partner asked me whether a rock was alive or not. FML
by shelbs61 / 08/30/2010 at 3:55pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/30/2010 at 3:30am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML
by Anonymous / 08/05/2010 at 4:30pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by EpicUsername / 03/10/2010 at 8:14pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals
by muffingirl / 02/10/2010 at 7:30am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I got a phone call from my dad, realizing it was a butt dial, I still decided to listen in.… Today, while at dinner for our three year anniversary I told my boyfriend that I believed there was… Today, While having sex with my boyfriend and close to orgasm, I hear my niece yell "I want a baby…