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FunkyAndFresh

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FunkyAndFresh
  • Town/Country : Kent, England
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 July 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 1383
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FunkyAndFresh : I iz crazy?!

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FunkyAndFresh's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

#17695095
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6888) - you deserved it (56187)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31997) - you deserved it (4152)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML

#17541030
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25573) - you deserved it (1769)

On 08/21/2011 at 8:03pm - misc - by Bobby ray slice - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

#17499822
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31072) - you deserved it (6407)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States

Today, I slipped on a plastic bag that my mom, the hoarder, was keeping on the stairs. I fell and sprained my ankle, getting rug burn in the process. Her response? Getting mad at me, putting the bag back on the stairs, then getting another to add to the pile. FML

#17465533
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22767) - you deserved it (1989)

On 08/14/2011 at 12:36am - health - by MomLovesMeLessThanTrash - United States (California)

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29643) - you deserved it (4066)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

#17404409
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47153) - you deserved it (3112)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML

#17381048
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27276) - you deserved it (3479)

On 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by moonstone15 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

#17344218
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30113) - you deserved it (2765)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34200) - you deserved it (9134)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML

#16344639
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43515) - you deserved it (3290)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

#16126147
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57559) - you deserved it (4484)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:17am - intimacy - by Chels (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

#15947062
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10134) - you deserved it (28929)

On 04/27/2011 at 9:35am - kids - by BadgerSpirit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML

#15846302
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25955) - you deserved it (3839)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:37am - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at a grocery store with my 3 year old son. As I was picking a cereal out, an older man comes over and says, "You should have used condoms. What an ugly boy." FML

#15628215
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56856) - you deserved it (5652)

On 04/03/2011 at 10:47pm - kids - by ravenskater -



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