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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Frishster

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Frishster
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1157
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Frishster's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML

#18982251 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (8260) - you deserved it (1042)

On 02/03/2012 at 2:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

#18981474 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (3682) - you deserved it (5393)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML

#18108138 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (24976) - you deserved it (5355)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:02am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

#18041675 (346)

I agree, your life sucks (14796) - you deserved it (21929)

On 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to visit my grandpa. He has an easily excited dog, who barreled into my freshly broken knee. I felt my knee move out of place again. The dog chipped a tooth. We went to the vet first. FML

#17988590 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (24665) - you deserved it (1820)

On 10/15/2011 at 10:02am - health - by KilteDKilleR - United States (Utah)

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

#16263941 (91)

I agree, your life sucks (18415) - you deserved it (9363)

On 05/20/2011 at 6:07am - misc - by Max Flynn -

Today, I wrote a mental note: don't tell a couple of nuns that you used black magic to fix their computer. Then don't tell the story to your boss just as the nuns walk back in again. Then don't say "speak of the devil" to them. FML

#14647834 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (6524) - you deserved it (20960)

On 01/20/2011 at 5:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me by finding orange panties in my closet. His excuse was "they're a Christmas gift." Thanks honey, I get panties that won't fit, and have little brown streaks. FML

#14022422 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (26742) - you deserved it (1862)

On 11/29/2010 at 10:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me, when I got off he smiled and told me as the doors were closing "the last twelve times was for fun." FML

#13777972 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (17618) - you deserved it (1628)

On 11/09/2010 at 2:00pm - misc - by nameless - United Kingdom

Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

#7932396 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (17382) - you deserved it (9057)

On 02/06/2010 at 10:19am - animals - by sadcat (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML

#7870282 (282)

I agree, your life sucks (18242) - you deserved it (5515)

On 02/04/2010 at 3:29am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

#7501218 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (29712) - you deserved it (2357)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145 (170)

I agree, your life sucks (35606) - you deserved it (2329)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer I saw her battery was flat so I said "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said "Not yet." FML

#5144800 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (8998) - you deserved it (34427)

On 09/09/2009 at 5:58am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, it was my birthday, and my boyfriend got surgery on his gallbladder because he had big gallstones. After they were removed, he was still a little out of it from the morphine. He gave the gallstones to me for my birthday. Better still, his mom suggested I make a necklace out of them. FML

#3603411 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (40510) - you deserved it (2285)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:02am - love - by gallstones (woman) - United States (Georgia)