Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FrietvanPiet

Online | Search for a member

FrietvanPiet

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 867
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About FrietvanPiet : Just enjoying the shit people have to suffer through.

FrietvanPiet's page activity

Visits<b>Twunt</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 1:47pm<b>ArcticDragon</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 12:46pm<b>anonymuse</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 12:01pm<b>InfestedCarOwner</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 5:01pm<b>LolaxLolz</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 1:04am<b>redmeer</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 4:43pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 12:10am<b>hellnosucka</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 10:32pm<b>turdoblast</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 6:45pm<b>sstahpp</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 6:24pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 5:29pm<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 10:59am<b>murph</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 4:56am<b>swimthenread27</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 8:17am<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 8:17am<b>lexwilder</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 10:20am<b>dimerneckel</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 3:48am<b>Sansa</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 4:12am

FrietvanPiet's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of FrietvanPiet's badges

FrietvanPiet's favorite FMLs

Today, while giving my final speech, a bump that had been growing on my arm popped. Pus leaked through my white dress sleeve, and it smelled like death. Everyone noticed. FML

#21501522
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22217) - you deserved it (2342)

On 12/08/2015 at 3:24pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parent's bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

#21497961
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20106) - you deserved it (26737)

On 11/28/2015 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by aj513 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I put one of those checkout dividers in front of my groceries on the conveyor belt in the supermarket. The guy standing in front of me turned around, looked me straight in the eye and said "I don't trust you." as he put a second divider between our groceries. FML

#21490307
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22403) - you deserved it (2429)

On 11/09/2015 at 9:07am - misc - by Quendolin - Germany

Today, my dog vomited a writhing mass of maggots. It was the most disgusting thing I've ever smelled, and I was baffled as to where she found a maggot infested dead thing to eat. Baffled, until my mom reminded me that my cat has been missing, presumed dead, for over a week. FML

#21469594
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26151) - you deserved it (1621)

On 09/17/2015 at 5:08pm - animals - by wormsmeat (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML

#21469567
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35396) - you deserved it (2448)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm - kids - by Angus (man) - France

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML

#21469191
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25697) - you deserved it (1746)

On 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm - animals - by Urinator - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is not a screamer nor a moaner, she's a biter. My arm is getting stitches right now. FML

#21393183
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32458) - you deserved it (3544)

On 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

#21392458
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31888) - you deserved it (5797)

On 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

#21371903
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38782) - you deserved it (4384)

On 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML

#21325871
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42539) - you deserved it (3165)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55524) - you deserved it (7203)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49892) - you deserved it (4241)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21141738
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57722) - you deserved it (8032)

On 05/16/2014 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by (not) fucked - United States (Texas)

Today, while driving out to the countryside with my new boyfriend, we came across a deer lying in the road. It seemed badly hurt, but instead of letting me get out and make sure, my boyfriend decided to just run over its head to finish it off, then continued driving with a smirk on his face. FML

#21138836
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57464) - you deserved it (8981)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:02pm - animals - by dating a big bag of dicks (woman) - United States



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: