FlamingColor

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Offline (the 05/10/2016 at 11:21pm)

FlamingColor

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 July 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2872
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About FlamingColor : I hope you're having a great day!

FlamingColor's page activity

Visits<b>BabooonLove</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 12:25am<b>bigwell</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 10:01pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 9:55pm<b>Rainbowkupkake</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:47am<b>gabix3</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:38am<b>Wideout40</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 11:54pm<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 8:23pm<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 7:22am<b>SourPatchTeen</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 1:57am<b>Aprill_cx</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 11:00pm<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 12:08pm<b>Risea</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 11:00am<b>seninaa</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 6:47am<b>Miss_Chevious</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 2:37pm<b>BexxyBb</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 3:44pm<b>MDoremis</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 4:16am<b>Justin1459</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 3:08pm<b>saffy66</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 6:30am

Fucked!<b>Aprill_cx</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 5:01am<b>BlondePsycho</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 11:18pm

FlamingColor's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of FlamingColor's badges

FlamingColor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex; I know that some women are great multitaskers, but I'm guessing it was a bad sign when she started to go over the shopping list. FML

by Fml / 04/12/2013 at 1:05am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, the McDonald's in my town ran out of fries. I was the one who had to tell all the angry customers we had no more fries in the store. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 3:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

by The_Black_Jesus / 03/31/2013 at 9:32am / United States / Kids

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, my sink seemed to be filling up with dirty water. Concerned, I turned on the garbage disposal and plunged away. With no change in the water levels, I called a plumber. He reached in, pulled out the drain plug, and give me his bill while chuckling to himself. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2013 at 10:52pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a "no-good fucking whore", because I couldn't fix his laptop. The same laptop he threw on the floor after screaming "FUCKING HEAL MEEE!" at his game. As ever, my parents took his side, refusing to believe that I can't fix a cracked monitor. FML

by cunts, cunts everywhere / 03/11/2013 at 7:57am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

by JimiHendrix / 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Health

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

by useless pos / 02/28/2013 at 7:48pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my mother's funeral, as everyone was around her casket for the viewing, my 5-year-old son in cluelessness of what was going on shouted, "Grandma is more fun when she isn't sleeping." Everyone cried. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 6:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so often over the past six months. It only happens whenever I do something "sneaky". My body reacts strongly to how I stress over potentially getting caught. I'm a private investigator, and I apparently need a new career. FML

by screwed / 02/10/2013 at 5:41am / United States / Work