About Feverrotes : I wanna do something so totally awesome right now.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of two years over the phone, I recieved a knock on my door. It was my now ex-girlfriend who came to seek revenge by shooting me in the balls with a paintball gun at about a three foot range. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11947) - you deserved it (38253)
On 12/28/2009 at 3:41pm - love - by lovehurts (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, at work a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her. So I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5400) - you deserved it (36223)
On 12/25/2009 at 3:10am - work - by harrassment101 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26981) - you deserved it (2082)
On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10263) - you deserved it (25843)
On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11488) - you deserved it (15076)
On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of almost a year, and to whom I intended to propose on Thanksgiving, dumped me because her husband will be returning from Iraq soon. And he wants to have a "talk" with me. I didn't know she was married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30572) - you deserved it (2455)
On 11/25/2009 at 8:56am - love - by blasted (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30953) - you deserved it (4860)
On 10/21/2009 at 4:27am - misc - by sore (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30953) - you deserved it (4860)
On 10/21/2009 at 4:27am - misc - by sore (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18130) - you deserved it (4755)
On 10/18/2009 at 9:11pm - animals - by Mary - Sent from mobile version
Today, my mum grounded me for going to my boyfriend's house instead of the library. She said my boyfriend's mum phoned up because she could hear us having it off in his room. When I denied it my mum shouted at me for being a liar as well as a slut. I did go to the library. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66812) - you deserved it (382)
On 09/07/2009 at 11:39am - love - by SingleGirl (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I went to Safeway. Go in, get stuff, come out, and I have almost no room to get into my car because an SUV was parked in a compact spot next to me all crooked. Irritated, I got a pen and paper and wrote 'Nice parking you F*ing idiot' and stuck it on the windshield. Then I notice someone was in the SUV. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11083) - you deserved it (31655)
On 08/11/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by Amanda (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML
I agree, your life sucks (34504) - you deserved it (20377)
On 07/30/2009 at 10:21am - intimacy - by verysadasian (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
I agree, your life sucks (73729) - you deserved it (15151)
On 06/26/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ILuvYouSoldiers (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (72606) - you deserved it (10081)
On 06/25/2009 at 12:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was at a 21st birthday party. It got to the bit where they blow out the candles and the girl hosting blew out her candles. While she was blowing I whispered to the fella next to me, "That's not the only thing she'll be blowing tonight". The guy next to me was her dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11281) - you deserved it (65408)
On 06/08/2009 at 6:39am - intimacy - by baller (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Friday 24 May 2013
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