FalconSam1414

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Offline (the 08/16/2015 at 8:36pm)

FalconSam1414

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 24446
  • Number of comments : 112
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FalconSam1414 : No.

FalconSam1414's page activity

Visits<b>nesssy</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 7:36pm<b>oreily12</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 11:12am<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 2:09pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 6:46am<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 12:06pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:05pm<b>boobear19883</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:31am<b>phantom_ninja</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 9:00am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 9:36am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 12:33am<b>SmuggletheBudgie</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 11:52pm<b>AurumPotestasEst</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 5:26pm<b>meepmerp</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 2:25am<b>Pitbull305</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 11:07pm<b>norzkenolzn</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 8:01am<b>SnowboardingLife</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 1:27pm<b>kianox</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 10:05am<b>chadchenz</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 1:50am

FalconSam1414's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of FalconSam1414's badges

FalconSam1414's favorite FMLs

Today, my little brother learned about mortality when our dog died. Since then, he's gone a little nuts and keeps ranting that he sees no point as to why our other dog should live. He's 16. FML

by Anonymous / 11/26/2014 at 7:09am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Animals

Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML

by uterurist / 11/22/2014 at 1:37pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

by UTRejected / 11/21/2014 at 8:51am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I've tried to have a quiet jack off four times, only for my dad to knock on my bedroom door within seconds and say "STOP IT." every single time. Now I'm too paranoid to even function. FML

by fuck fof and die dad / 11/20/2014 at 2:48pm / Germany (Schleswig-Holstein) / Intimacy

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

by jigglypluff / 11/19/2014 at 12:27am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

by drugsforthugs / 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while lying in bed cuddling with my cat after getting stood up, I found out that even 80-year-old Charles Manson is engaged to be married. FML

by jessiejaybee / 11/18/2014 at 5:41am / United States / Love

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

by no / 11/16/2014 at 9:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

by tine / 11/16/2014 at 4:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I have an Army fitness test. I was worried I'd cramp up during the last mile of the run, so I drank a large amount of water in preparation. I later woke up in the very small barracks that I share with three other people, soaking in a puddle of my own piss. FML

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

by That_Indian_Guy / 11/15/2014 at 8:25am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I found out that my mom is doing a study and is keeping used pads in the freezer. FML

by PPP / 11/13/2014 at 10:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, while bringing boxes up from the basement, I noticed a few spider egg sacs had stuck to my shirt. As I desperately tried to remove them, they hatched. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2014 at 5:20pm / United States / Animals

Today, my teacher "busted" me for writing down answers on my arm for a test. The so called "answers" was just a duck my little nephew had drawn on my hand the night before. She's actually trying to get me suspended over it. FML

by really / 11/13/2014 at 1:17pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was speeding home, bursting to take a crap. I pulled into my driveway and made it inside, before my wife told me the plumber was still working on our pipes. I ended up having to take a crap in my own backyard, behind a tree. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2014 at 1:01pm / United States (California) / Health