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FalconSam1414

Offline (the 08/24/2014 at 9:35pm) | Search for a member

FalconSam1414

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5683
  • Number of comments : 112
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FalconSam1414 : I love animals and nature. Peregrine falcons are my favorite animal!!! I also am a published author and I hope to become a falconer someday.

FalconSam1414's page activity

Visits<b>phantom_ninja</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 9:00am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 9:36am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 12:33am<b>SmuggletheBudgie</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 11:52pm<b>AurumPotestasEst</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 5:26pm<b>meepmerp</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 2:25am<b>Pitbull305</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 11:07pm<b>norzkenolzn</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 8:01am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 4:12pm<b>SnowboardingLife</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 1:27pm<b>kianox</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 10:05am<b>chadchenz</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 1:50am<b>steal_this</b> - the 08/29/2013 at 9:11pm<b>Iniezian</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 10:13pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 7:27am<b>mrpvtstock</b> - the 03/27/2013 at 1:19am<b>chelleFML</b> - the 03/27/2013 at 1:06am<b>lexxiii</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 9:35pm

FalconSam1414's FML badges

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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FalconSam1414's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a TV show about wildlife. The moment the narrator said the word "peacock", my boyfriend broke down into hysterical laughter. He laughed to the point of tears, and had to excuse himself. I'm dating a man-child. FML

#21243818
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34568) - you deserved it (7106)

On 08/23/2014 at 1:51pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after a long silent and awkward pause after asking my girlfriend's dad if I can take her on holiday for Christmas, he looked me dead in the eyes and said "No, you may not impregnate my daughter." FML

#21243591
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38833) - you deserved it (4715)

On 08/23/2014 at 3:34am - intimacy - by Dafuq happen there - South Africa

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

#21243162
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36253) - you deserved it (5701)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:04pm - misc - by lonely loser (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML

#21243040
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39242) - you deserved it (2724)

On 08/22/2014 at 9:14am - work - by Beeky (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

#21242552
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39611) - you deserved it (2517)

On 08/21/2014 at 3:30pm - misc - by stepshart - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42383) - you deserved it (7410)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62922) - you deserved it (4093)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

#21241122
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36694) - you deserved it (9988)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41780) - you deserved it (15572)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39164) - you deserved it (8134) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to get my hair cut. My stylist had the greatest tattoo of a rat on her arm. I spent the whole appointment thinking about how cool the tattoo was, and what an interesting person she must be to choose such a thing. So I complimented her on it and she said, "Oh it's a wolf." FML

#21239690
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37393) - you deserved it (6307)

On 08/17/2014 at 11:19am - misc - by Etrius (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21489) - you deserved it (35390)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

#21234535
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38247) - you deserved it (3125)

On 08/11/2014 at 1:11am - misc - by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42539) - you deserved it (3774)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41873) - you deserved it (6094)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



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