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Falassalond

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Falassalond
  • Town/Country : NY, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 October 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1611
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Falassalond : Hi! I've been on FML for a long time. I read comments a lot. The best part of FML is the comments. Most of you have probably made me laugh. So thanks. Have a nice day!

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Falassalond's favorite FMLs

Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML

#21046394
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41523) - you deserved it (7676)

On 01/31/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39765) - you deserved it (11621)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I ran into my apartment and let one rip, since I'd been holding it the whole elevator ride up. My parents had let themselves in while I was out, and laughed at me for a good 20 minutes. 5ML

#21038740
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35197) - you deserved it (5795)

On 01/24/2014 at 8:34pm - misc - by DJ (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML

#21036142
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39622) - you deserved it (4820)

On 01/22/2014 at 2:23pm - misc - by IMSERIOUS - United States (California)

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

#21025933
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30271) - you deserved it (37451)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43089) - you deserved it (4322)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML

#21021758
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45132) - you deserved it (3970)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by loganHchrist - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53663) - you deserved it (22214)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

#21019316
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46230) - you deserved it (15914)

On 01/06/2014 at 6:00pm - animals - by Z3R0G5 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

#21015899
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40177) - you deserved it (7591) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Elisa_LmR (woman) - France

Today, I woke up to every window in my house packed with snow. It was so bad that I thought I'd been snowed-in, and I started freaking out. It took two hours and multiple phone calls before I found out that my neighbor had taken our prank war too seriously and staged the whole thing. FML

#21015630
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35850) - you deserved it (11636)

On 01/03/2014 at 4:04pm - misc - by thanks.... (man) - United States

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

#21008001
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41437) - you deserved it (4617)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:23am - animals - by honeybunny90 - United States (Texas)

Today, I pretended to cry in front of my cat because she doesn't cuddle with me anymore. Yeah, I tried to guilt-trip my cat into loving me. FML

#21003528
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37557) - you deserved it (9475)

On 12/24/2013 at 11:53am - animals - by PityKitty (woman) -

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

#21002747
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20079) - you deserved it (41787)

On 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm - work - by dr immature (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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