[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

FYLminerocks

Search for a member

FYLminerocks
  • Town/Country : New yooookkkk
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 830
  • Number of comments : 89
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About FYLminerocks : .

FYLminerocks's last visitors

Freezeddh85CoolNSexyTimberlakeEricGreeenEggsAndHamralletsMillertime0689LOLSMILEYFACE331daytripper82RedPillSucks

FYLminerocks's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of FYLminerocks's badges

FYLminerocks's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML

#19667641 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (5842) - you deserved it (729)

On 05/23/2012 at 1:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (6253) - you deserved it (430)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was reading a book on paper for the first time in maybe a month. I had to stop at a word I did not recognise. Because I'm so used to using a Kindle, I tried to get the definition by pressing it. I had my finger on the word for a few seconds before I realised it was paper. FML

#19637178 (191)

I agree, your life sucks (1533) - you deserved it (8274)

On 05/17/2012 at 2:57pm - misc - by Bilze - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was having dinner with my college friends to celebrate the end of our first year. I said really great things about them as individuals. The only thing they had to say to me was, "Thanks for being the token black friend." FML

I agree, your life sucks (14737) - you deserved it (1702)

On 05/14/2012 at 10:23pm - misc - by foreverbrown (man) - United States

Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML

#19600497 (175)

I agree, your life sucks (6572) - you deserved it (706)

On 05/09/2012 at 11:34pm - misc - by I Don't Exorcise - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML

#19588990 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (8025) - you deserved it (837)

On 05/07/2012 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by coffeeshopgirl (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML

#19584517 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (7378) - you deserved it (661)

On 05/06/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by gutted (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

#19578544 (225)

I agree, your life sucks (4353) - you deserved it (7358)

On 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm - animals - by doggone - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

#19576314 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (4446) - you deserved it (1694)

On 05/05/2012 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, feeling desperate, I asked my dad for advice on how to get a girl. He asked me why I want to even date. I panicked and said I just wanted to make someone happy. He told me that if I wanted to make someone happy, I should "just start by getting a goddamn vasectomy". FML

I agree, your life sucks (5223) - you deserved it (590)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:01pm - love - by AnonymousUser (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377 (170)

I agree, your life sucks (3283) - you deserved it (10665)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML

#19569212 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (5596) - you deserved it (496)

On 05/03/2012 at 5:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

#19568801 (202)

I agree, your life sucks (6961) - you deserved it (2109)

On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

#19561833 (352)

I agree, your life sucks (3565) - you deserved it (12318) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)



Your account

↓ Categories

FML's blog

05/15/2012

The whole blog

Switch to FML for visually impaired

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: