FMLenV

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FMLenV

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5031
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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FMLenV's page activity

Visits<b>coolade28</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 10:49pm<b>Amarie33</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 7:40pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 9:46am<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:31pm<b>dfadi</b> - the 01/16/2010 at 12:35am<b>depinaariana</b> - the 11/30/2009 at 9:15pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/30/2009 at 9:02pm<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 08/25/2009 at 1:48pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 3:51pm<b>nametheband</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 8:59am<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/12/2009 at 8:51am<b>mariokartwii</b> - the 07/28/2009 at 4:00pm

FMLenV's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

FMLenV's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML

by luckygirl / 12/14/2009 at 4:05am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML

by RBEE / 12/12/2009 at 1:02pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did it, I realized there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper, he never did and came out without socks. FML

by dayum / 12/10/2009 at 4:03pm / Mexico (Chihuahua) / Miscellaneous

Today, we had our annual office Christmas party. The theme of the party was "Ugliest Sweater". The winner was a sweater that I have an exact replica of in my closet. It's my favorite 'special occasion', 'family portrait' and 'holiday' sweater. FML

by NotHauteCouture / 12/10/2009 at 3:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog received a christmas card before I did. FML

by amywee / 12/09/2009 at 10:33am / United Kingdom (York) / Animals

Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML

by olive_costume / 12/04/2009 at 8:16pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an elderly man come to my cash register. His total came to $15.50 He handed me $5 in nickels and dimes. A full roll of quarters. Before I could take the roll, he bust it open, making me count it. After that was all counted he was 50 cents short. So he handed me a $10 bill. FML

by Chels / 12/04/2009 at 1:27am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I started growing hair on my upper lip. I'm finally becoming a man! Too bad I'm a 17 year old girl. FML

by harry / 12/04/2009 at 12:55am / Hong Kong / Health

Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML

by wobbles / 12/04/2009 at 12:28am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML

by Jen / 12/01/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I pulled over to help an attractive girl on the highway in the middle of nowhere. When I asked if she needed help she told me she was going to try starting her car one more time. She then started to make fake engine noises and told me that she was good to go and that I should be on my way. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2009 at 2:27am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, a mall cop tore up my 'Free hugs' sign. FML

by Cornbreesha / 11/28/2009 at 2:13am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was explaining the inner parts of a vagina and how they work. To my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2009 at 12:25am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

by obsessed / 11/27/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous