EyesofStone

Search for a member

Offline (the 04/27/2016 at 8:51pm)

EyesofStone

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 June 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3365
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About EyesofStone : I've been around FML for a quite some time, but just made an account. I've been watching long enough to know the regulars, to spell check all comments, and to not ask stupid questions like, "What does OP stand for??"
I mean, everyone knows it's Oscillating Potato.
Been lurking/ for about 4.5 years at this point.
Docbastard is my FML hero.
I have a dry sense of humor but it shouldn't offend anyone.
There's nothing I hate more than the people who manage to use a word three or more time in FMLs that are three or fewer sentences long.
My user name comes from a line in a Backstreet Boys song.

EyesofStone's page activity

Visits<b>crazy_bananas</b> - 12 hours ago<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 12:29am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 9:27pm<b>Sweet_Melody</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 7:17pm<b>Dexter83</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 6:24pm<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 1:49pm<b>Miss_Chevious</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:36am<b>HelloKiittyy</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 1:38am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 12:50am<b>Arnoud</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 1:07am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 10:40pm<b>khnumber15</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 6:29pm<b>alex997</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 12:46am<b>qwertydude1</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 11:12pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:08pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:55am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 9:14pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:32am

Fucked!<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 2:28am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 4:41am<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 8:26am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 10:40pm

EyesofStone's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of EyesofStone's badges

EyesofStone's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents found several drawings of a dinosaur girl in various bondage equipment posing seductively in my purse. The drawings weren't mine, nor do I have any idea where they came from, but my parents now think I'm a freak. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2010 at 9:03am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML

by blackitalian / 11/26/2010 at 10:43am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a hummingbird somehow got into my house. I spent two and a half hours trying to get it out after finally using a blanket to catch it. I run outside to release it from my hands, and it flew back into my house. FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2010 at 12:17pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 5:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I woke up to a broken window and 3 guys sitting in my living room watching TV. FML

by anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 11:06pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

by cantstoplaughing / 10/06/2010 at 12:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML

by Amandajean32 / 08/04/2010 at 8:02pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

by Betchsadface / 07/13/2010 at 12:34am / United States / Animals

Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML

by weirdesout / 06/04/2010 at 10:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML

by during / 05/19/2010 at 8:12am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

by bleredoshia / 04/08/2010 at 12:27am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Kids

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

by Hate2Date / 04/05/2010 at 1:14am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend ran accidentally head-first into my face and left me with a giant black eye. My mother is convinced I had a seizure in a park somewhere and won't listen when I tell her she's wrong, and everyone else thinks my boyfriend is abusive. FML

by el211 / 03/15/2010 at 3:35am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

by EpicUsername / 03/10/2010 at 8:14pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, to my surprise my girlfriend said, "I've never felt this way before." We have been dating for six months, and I knew that I loved her, so I replied, "Me neither, I love you." There was a long awkward pause. Turns out, she was talking about her abnormally painful period cramps. FML

by dan / 01/24/2010 at 7:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love