Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EyesofStone

Offline (the 05/29/2015 at 6:05pm) | Search for a member

EyesofStone

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2796
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About EyesofStone : I've been around FML for a quite some time, but just made an account. I've been watching long enough to know the regulars, to spell check all comments, and to not ask stupid questions like, "What does OP stand for??"
I mean, everyone knows it's Oscillating Potato.
Docbastard is my FML hero.
I have a dry sense of humor but it shouldn't offend anyone.
There's nothing I hate more than the people who manage to use a word three or more time in FMLs that are three or fewer sentences long.
My user name comes from a line in a Backstreet Boys song.

EyesofStone's page activity

Visits<b>missmorggan</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:08pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:55am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 9:14pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:32am<b>Season_D</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 11:17pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 2:26am<b>IamAngryCoffee</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 4:23am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:56am<b>MattChristensen</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 11:37am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 7:06pm<b>ChristinePi</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:19pm<b>tehdarkness</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 11:21pm<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 5:01pm<b>lauralabia3</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:36am<b>wakemeupplease</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 8:37pm<b>chrisbreastr0kr</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 2:29pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:09am<b>CFB_FRS</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 11:02pm

Fucked!<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 8:26am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 10:40pm

EyesofStone's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of EyesofStone's badges

EyesofStone's favorite FMLs

Today, a fight broke out between my 21 year old sister and our 6 year old brother. I tried to intervene, only to end up getting battered to shit in the process. According to my sister, he's going to hell for eating her candy. FML

#17539205
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27980) - you deserved it (3191)

On 08/21/2011 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wife and I almost got a divorce over a game of Yahtzee. FML

#17398977
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28722) - you deserved it (15632)

On 08/07/2011 at 5:44pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11825) - you deserved it (79722) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11825) - you deserved it (79722) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML

#16957068
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15547) - you deserved it (45416)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML

#16957068
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15547) - you deserved it (45416)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I sent my romantic interest a sexy text about a dream I had about a "sex gameshow." I sent it by replying to the last text sent. I'm now responsible for traumatizing my 12 year old niece who could only reply, "Like Jeopardy?" FML

#16842955
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10106) - you deserved it (43251)

On 06/25/2011 at 12:32am - intimacy - by PandaMantis (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML

#16596385
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22271) - you deserved it (49710)

On 06/10/2011 at 3:06pm - love - by gabxoxo03 - United States (New York)

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
491 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16880) - you deserved it (77480)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I logged on to Facebook and had 64 notifications. I thought that perhaps I was popular. But no, it was my ten year old sister, liking 64 of my pictures. FML

#15866810
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30318) - you deserved it (6121)

On 04/20/2011 at 10:57pm - misc - by GshDrnt (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20722) - you deserved it (31777)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I opened a cupboard and a brick fell on my head. The same brick my mum put up there to "keep it out of the way". FML

#15447390
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33082) - you deserved it (4190)

On 03/23/2011 at 11:22am - misc - by EllieJ -

Today, I opened a cupboard and a brick fell on my head. The same brick my mum put up there to "keep it out of the way". FML

#15447390
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33082) - you deserved it (4190)

On 03/23/2011 at 11:22am - misc - by EllieJ -

Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML

#14696721
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8428) - you deserved it (60753)

On 01/24/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by moxy -

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

#14106944
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15031) - you deserved it (24564)

On 12/06/2010 at 12:03pm - misc - by bribreeeeeezyfreshhh (woman) - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: