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Offline (the 05/29/2015 at 6:05pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2935
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About EyesofStone : I've been around FML for a quite some time, but just made an account. I've been watching long enough to know the regulars, to spell check all comments, and to not ask stupid questions like, "What does OP stand for??"
I mean, everyone knows it's Oscillating Potato.
Docbastard is my FML hero.
I have a dry sense of humor but it shouldn't offend anyone.
There's nothing I hate more than the people who manage to use a word three or more time in FMLs that are three or fewer sentences long.
My user name comes from a line in a Backstreet Boys song.

EyesofStone's page activity

Visits<b>qwertydude1</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 11:12pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:08pm<b>hai111</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:55am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 9:14pm<b>hantu69</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:32am<b>Season_D</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 11:17pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 2:26am<b>IamAngryCoffee</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 4:23am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:56am<b>MattChristensen</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 11:37am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 7:06pm<b>ChristinePi</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:19pm<b>tehdarkness</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 11:21pm<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 5:01pm<b>lauralabia3</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:36am<b>wakemeupplease</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 8:37pm<b>chrisbreastr0kr</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 2:29pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:09am

Fucked!<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 8:26am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 10:40pm

EyesofStone's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of EyesofStone's badges

EyesofStone's favorite FMLs

Today, I got yelled at for 'letting' my muddy dog jump on my cousin's wedding dress as she was getting ready. I don't own a dog and haven't since I was a kid. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32564) - you deserved it (2249)

On 05/04/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by FMe - United Kingdom

Today, my grandma rushed into my work and told my manager I had to leave due to a family emergency. Panicked, I ran to get my stuff and ran to the car. When I asked what had happened, she replied, "I needed someone to go see 50 Shades of Grey with me." FML


I agree, your life sucks (35107) - you deserved it (3788)

On 02/13/2015 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He told me he'd ask his dad if it was okay. I thought he was just kidding, until he pulled out his phone and called his dad. After a few minutes of "come on, dad" and "but why?" he hung up and said his dad wouldn't let him. He's 22. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59376) - you deserved it (4914)

On 08/06/2013 at 4:35pm - love - by (._. ) (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49475) - you deserved it (18070)

On 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm - kids - by thanks, Nemo. - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32635) - you deserved it (69271)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML


I agree, your life sucks (67174) - you deserved it (15361)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53646) - you deserved it (24732)

On 05/27/2013 at 7:19am - misc - by i hit a cyclist (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45520) - you deserved it (8623)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16819) - you deserved it (52760)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML


I agree, your life sucks (14029) - you deserved it (31515)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25701) - you deserved it (4455)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25199) - you deserved it (1531)

On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31377) - you deserved it (5838)

On 11/16/2012 at 8:06pm - work - by wow @ creepy fuckers (man) - United States

Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24593) - you deserved it (1729)

On 11/14/2012 at 2:46am - love - by he's mine (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

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