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EyesofStone

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EyesofStone
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1022
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About EyesofStone : I've been around FML for a quite some time, but just made an account. I've been watching long enough to know the regulars, to spell check all comments, and to not ask stupid questions like, "What does OP stand for??"
I mean, everyone knows it's Oscillating Potato.
Docbastard is my FML hero.
I have a dry sense of humor but it shouldn't offend anyone.
My user name comes from a line in a Backstreet Boys song.

EyesofStone's last visitors

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EyesofStone's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of EyesofStone's badges

EyesofStone's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

#20691071
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61564) - you deserved it (13914)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32463) - you deserved it (5454)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12883) - you deserved it (44959)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

#20191552
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9668) - you deserved it (19661)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML

#20186953
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18387) - you deserved it (3590)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML

#20175516
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18627) - you deserved it (1085)

On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML

#20165849
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21119) - you deserved it (3774)

On 11/16/2012 at 8:06pm - work - by wow @ creepy fuckers (man) - United States

Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML

#20162804
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18713) - you deserved it (1285)

On 11/14/2012 at 2:46am - love - by he's mine (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML

#20162804
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18713) - you deserved it (1285)

On 11/14/2012 at 2:46am - love - by he's mine (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML

#20138384
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23212) - you deserved it (1248)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:03am - misc - by StormSeason (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while walking on a nearly empty street, my friend dared me to slap a tall muscular chick on the butt and run away. I went and did it, but before I even had a chance to turn and run, she grabbed me, bent me over her knee and spanked me until I cried. My friend filmed it. FML

#20130842
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6469) - you deserved it (44533)

On 10/24/2012 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my wife confused terminology from my religion with stuff from Harry Potter. FML

#20127336
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7836) - you deserved it (11564)

On 10/21/2012 at 9:21pm - misc - by nickw177 (man) - United States

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21354) - you deserved it (4098)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I learned from my daughter's teacher that she has been wearing the same shirt for the past few weeks, ever since we had a fight about how I don't pay attention to her. FML

#20117763
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6071) - you deserved it (52345)

On 10/15/2012 at 6:28am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, at around 11pm the police made a visit to my house, explaining how my neighbors had thought I was using a universal remote to change their television channels. FML

#20099119
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18977) - you deserved it (1043)

On 10/02/2012 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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