Evanito007

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Offline (the 12/22/2014 at 3:15am)

Evanito007

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2518
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Evanito007 : Im just a simple man.

Evanito007's page activity

Visits<b>idefka</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:01pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:05pm<b>lfish62</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 2:15pm<b>hey72297</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 7:31pm<b>Infamous278</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 9:39pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 8:06am<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:29pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 6:07pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 4:46pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 10:38pm<b>lastunusedname</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 6:04pm<b>kumalo</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 10:27pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 6:27pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 3:59pm<b>Catkam623</b> - the 03/21/2013 at 10:51am<b>kansah</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 4:55pm<b>Smartdumbblonde</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 3:24pm<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 2:50pm

Evanito007's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Evanito007's badges

Evanito007's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

by FML! / 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I couldn't shut a drawer in my kitchen, because an oven mitt was blocking it. An oven mitt filled with tin-foil wrapped electronics. My Mom believes Internet hackers can get into her digital camera and prepaid cell phone, and apparently tin-foil will prevent that. FML

by BelleCharmante / 07/14/2011 at 12:50am / United States (North Carolina) / Geek

Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2011 at 4:39pm / Switzerland (Vaud) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came to the conclusion that you should always tell the truth. While I was busy reassuring her that the condom didn't break, she was telling me how it was okay because she was on the pill. According to the pregnancy test, we both lied. FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2010 at 9:47am / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I found out that the reason my best friend is not allowed over anymore is because he hits on my mom and writes her love letters. FML

by Bestfrienduncool / 09/30/2010 at 1:11am / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend was crying. I asked her what was wrong, and she said her husband was going to divorce her for seeing me. FML

by Pip / 02/23/2010 at 4:13pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my mom sold the car I've been working on for the last few years for 100 dollars. To buy gas for her car. FML

by Butter_Cup / 12/28/2009 at 4:39pm / United States (California) / Money

Today, after many, many attempts to get her out of my life, the girl that is stalking me told me that she loves me and our love can only be ended by her killing either herself or me. FML

by cheezmaster / 12/16/2009 at 6:55pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was sitting with a friend who moved back into town, and he told me about how he hooked up with a girl at a bar last night. I asked him if she was hot, he responded "Yeah, I have a picture of her on my phone." It was a picture of my girlfriend. FML

by anonymous / 11/21/2009 at 3:00am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML

by snapped / 11/12/2009 at 11:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend and I watched Juno. When the baby is born in the film, I put my arm around my girlfriend and whispered in her ear that one day it could be us having a baby. She responded by punching me in the happy sacks and telling me I wasn't getting any from her in a long time. FML

by Ouch / 10/21/2009 at 5:55pm / United Kingdom (St. Helens) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML

by jaxattax / 10/20/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving down the road when a dog suddenly runs across the street. In attempt to spare its life, I swerved to the side of the road and rear-ended another car. The car I hit belonged the family that owned the dog. Now I have to pay them because I saved their dog's life. FML

by JC / 10/19/2009 at 2:40am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I told my 13 year old daughter that she was grounded from using her phone. Later on, I get an important call regarding a job that I have been after. After I'd picked up the phone, my daughter starts screaming "HELP! RAPE! HELP!" on the other phone. I don't think I'll be getting the job. FML

by MGZ / 10/18/2009 at 10:33pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids