Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About EvanescenceLuver : Hey people! As my name states, I love Evanescence! But I love other bands too! I had a hard time choosing between Avenged Sevenfold, The Used, or Three Days Grace (My all-time FAV band). I turned 15 just a little while ago, and I love to draw and write. I'm good at both too, yay! XD I wish I could say that I drew my profile pic, but alas, I cannot. T_T FML wouldn't let me upload the pics I drew, since they were done on paint, but oh well!
So like, what else am I supposed to put on here...?
Um... I'd join the National Guard if I could, but they won't take me cause I have a mental disorder... Lol, isn't it funny that we can tell people shit like that (mental disorder part) on the internet, but won't admit it to our own friends and family?
Also... The glass is not half-full. The glass is not half-empty. THE GLASS DOES NOT HAVE AS MUCH FUCKING WATER AS IT SHOULD, SO EITHER DRINK IT OR FILL IT UP, MORONS! GAWD. Quit freaking debating it!
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
Friday 19 December 2014