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EpicGuy70

Offline (the 08/22/2014 at 6:22pm) | Search for a member

EpicGuy70

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 255
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About EpicGuy70 : I am merely a student who loves having fun, getting to know people,and traveling. I will always say hello, write a comment, and help you out on FML.

EpicGuy70's page activity

Visits<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 2:30pm<b>testtest2</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 9:39am<b>Afroninja4566</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:43pm<b>TdotMaria</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:05pm<b>lirideout</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:33pm<b>xzxXxzx</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 3:59am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 10:51am<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:03am<b>fueledbyhate</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 3:21am<b>LickitungJr</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 12:25am<b>Randy_Orton</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 6:21pm<b>haddiej</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 1:08pm<b>skulltorn</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 12:34pm<b>AetherFox42</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 10:57pm<b>DArthurVaderian</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 6:33pm<b>powerrangerpunk</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 10:06am<b>Unlucky_Genius</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 12:17am<b>Ausdank</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 2:54pm

Liked!<b>zbyszeq</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 11:19pm

EpicGuy70's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of EpicGuy70's badges

EpicGuy70's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44533) - you deserved it (7539)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41531) - you deserved it (5688)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24245) - you deserved it (44605)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, I went camping with my husband not too far from our house. We got our tent pitched up, stove ready and roll-out bed out. He then said, "I'm just gonna go for a walk." It had been about an hour before I decided to go find him. He had walked home to play CoD. FML

#21239602
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44357) - you deserved it (4844)

On 08/17/2014 at 6:19am - misc - by AnnoyedWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42272) - you deserved it (13707)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43180) - you deserved it (4167)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my boss threw out the report I wrote for the board of directors. He said that if it were legal, he'd smash me in the balls with a brick for using Comic Sans. I had to do the whole thing again in another font with my coworkers snickering at me. FML

#21238351
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20167) - you deserved it (49389)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49555) - you deserved it (4870)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while taking out the trash, I swung the bag back and forth, which caused it to slide across my leg. An opened aluminum can inside the bag ended up slicing through my calf, causing heavy bleeding. Baked beans sent me to the hospital. FML

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14998) - you deserved it (71892)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35311) - you deserved it (5000)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, a customer came into McDonalds and placed his order. He insisted on putting each coin on the counter rather than handing them straight to me, because he doesn't like touching "poor people". FML

#21234971
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45047) - you deserved it (3297)

On 08/11/2014 at 3:54pm - work - by poorman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML

#21234068
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33102) - you deserved it (8404)

On 08/10/2014 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42016) - you deserved it (6110)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)



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