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Encutielucie's favorite FMLs
by maruskasommers / 01/09/2012 at 4:39am / Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML
by Whyme / 01/09/2012 at 1:14am / United States (Texas) / Love
by caught / 01/08/2012 at 7:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by omgwhyme / 01/08/2012 at 9:36am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 01/08/2012 at 7:24am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I was watching wrestling videos on YouTube, when my little brother walked in. Later, my little brother told my parents that I was watching naked men on my computer. They won't stop thinking that I was watching gay porn. FML
by Anonymous / 11/12/2011 at 9:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was following my friend to her house in my car, because I didn't know where it was. I'd been following her for at least an hour when she pulled into a gas station. Turns out I'd been following the wrong car. I have no idea where I am. FML
by friedchicken / 11/12/2011 at 1:43am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation
by kirrby / 11/12/2011 at 1:41am / United States (Nevada) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/12/2011 at 12:34am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML
by boopadoop / 10/20/2011 at 1:35pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
Today, I was at a bar with my friend, when I noticed a young lad at a table near to us. I thought it'd be funny to jeer and flick peanuts at him. I went to the restroom, only to come back to my friend face-down on the floor. Turns out the guy fucked him up instead, and now he won't talk to me. FML
by Cooper491 / 09/15/2011 at 5:22pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to fire an employee because she constantly calls in, or is late to work. She became very emotional and I felt kind of bad, so I walked her out myself. We then got stuck in the company elevator. FML
by thatsmejl / 09/15/2011 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML
by Japaroni / 09/15/2011 at 3:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
- Today, my new boyfriend and I really wanted to have sex, but he went soft as soon as he entered me.… Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to… Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse…