EnSigne

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EnSigne

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 26 May 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1739
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About EnSigne : My name is Signe, and I'm from Sweden. And that's about all you need to know about me. So... yeah. Nevermind.

Oh, and please don't be a dirty perv and try to message me about cyber stuff, I am NOT interested.

EnSigne's page activity

Visits<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 6:16am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:37pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 2:47pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/13/2012 at 12:10am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 02/06/2012 at 5:29pm<b>danielle25</b> - the 01/19/2012 at 2:08pm<b>KiddNYC1O</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 9:20pm<b>paco1021</b> - the 12/06/2011 at 6:10pm<b>stefanie1234</b> - the 12/04/2011 at 4:39am<b>Tsunami87</b> - the 12/03/2011 at 5:49pm<b>suoerkewl</b> - the 12/03/2011 at 3:17am<b>every1luvsboners</b> - the 12/01/2011 at 3:16pm<b>fanceh</b> - the 11/29/2011 at 12:28am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 11/14/2011 at 10:28am<b>nachtfee</b> - the 09/18/2011 at 6:46pm

EnSigne's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of EnSigne's badges

EnSigne's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2009 at 12:52am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

by DSM / 03/14/2009 at 7:05am / United States (North Dakota) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a girl texting at school. I told her she might want to put her phone away before she got a detention. She turned around and I saw she was changing her insulin level on her pump. She has diabetes. FML

by kcd / 02/23/2009 at 9:41am / United States (Kentucky) / Health

Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML

by Nick / 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I kneeled down to tie my shoe and sneezed, nailing my face off of my knee and breaking my nose. FML

by ouchmynose / 02/17/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

by abi_vet_student / 02/13/2009 at 7:42am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Animals

Today, I met someone with the same name as me for the first time ever. I'm 20 years old, he is 97. FML

by Heyhey / 12/08/2008 at 3:46am / Miscellaneous