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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, it's my birthday, and apparently my family forgot it. But one person didn't forget. My dog gave me a little present in my new shoes I bought for myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21762) - you deserved it (1278)
On 12/19/2009 at 4:44pm - animals - by googly191 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was talking to my aunt about my brother's recent arrest for drug possession. I proudly told her that I have never done drugs of any kind. Her response: "Well, actually you were born addicted to heroin, so you had a drug problem long before your brother." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23880) - you deserved it (2116)
On 12/18/2009 at 2:23pm - health - by drugbaby (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I looked at my house in Google Street View for the first time and noticed an unfamiliar vehicle in the driveway. When I asked my wife about it, she admitted to have an ongoing affair. Apparently the entire world knew my wife was having an affair before I did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28799) - you deserved it (1739)
On 12/18/2009 at 9:31am - love - by cheaters_should_die (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23469) - you deserved it (1259)
On 12/18/2009 at 1:52am - misc - by Theo (man) - United States (New York)
Today, a cute guy asked for my phone number and I gladly gave it to him. I was feeling really good about myself for getting hit on by the star football player. That was until he called 8 times and left 5 messages. In 2 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15663) - you deserved it (6671)
On 12/18/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by WhoaThere (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47321) - you deserved it (2427)
On 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50603) - you deserved it (2537)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48252) - you deserved it (1898)
On 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27690) - you deserved it (57724)
On 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm - kids - by bubbalicious (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51301) - you deserved it (2462)
On 08/08/2009 at 9:42am - misc - by oshitdonotwant (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I am working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she is wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37448) - you deserved it (7404)
On 07/23/2009 at 2:13am - work - by published_anthropologist (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend returned from a 2 month internship in New York. As I saw him exit the plane, I imagined him running to me and kissing/spinning me around passionately like in movies. He got closer and closer, and as I opened my arms to embrace him, he runs past me saying, "BRB, I GOTTA TAKE A SHIT." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42730) - you deserved it (6898)
On 07/04/2009 at 2:07am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while watching The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh with my 5 year old, I realized why the kangaroo's name is Kanga, and why her son's name is Roo. Kanga-Roo. Get it? Yeah. I didn't until today. I'm 47. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15539) - you deserved it (35144)
On 07/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by slightlyslow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I called back a number I recently missed a call from. To my surprise, it was the number of my boyfriend's fiancé. I've been with him 4 years, he's been with her for 6. Turns out, not only is he a cheating jerk, but technically I'M the other woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45975) - you deserved it (3208)
On 07/02/2009 at 9:31am - love - by Anna (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20358) - you deserved it (59128)
On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
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