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EmmaCecilie

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EmmaCecilie

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  • Number of visits : 584
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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EmmaCecilie's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML

#18052574
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52660) - you deserved it (4141)

On 10/23/2011 at 7:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out my boss and some employees on my floor have bets placed on who can get the best picture of my ass. I found out when one of the pictures was accidentally sent to me. FML

#18022998
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29794) - you deserved it (3642)

On 10/19/2011 at 12:49pm - work - by ikickgingers - United States

Today, somebody ordered pizza and sent it to the house across the street from them, so they could shoot at the pizza guy with an air-soft gun from the upstairs of their house. I was that delivery guy. FML

#17973373
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30445) - you deserved it (1917)

On 10/13/2011 at 4:17am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML

#17973250
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33949) - you deserved it (9278)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:19am - intimacy - by scewable (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that it takes about half an hour to get melted cheese out of your hair. FML

#17956536
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19521) - you deserved it (5430)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm - health - by jzappe - United States (California)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

#17954920
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26010) - you deserved it (5863)

On 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm - health - by maniac11 - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my boyfriend over to meet the family. After several long moments of silence, one of my sisters burst out laughing, and asked, "Okay, who is this guy really?" FML

#17954133
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26171) - you deserved it (2607)

On 10/10/2011 at 7:16pm - love - by octoberrain - United States (Ohio)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34525) - you deserved it (24626)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom yelled at me because I refused to lend her money. The reason I won't lend her money? The last time I did, she and my dad went out and bought a Macbook and a new car instead of paying bills. Apparently I'm being 'selfish' by keeping my own money and putting it towards university. FML

#17951348
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35797) - you deserved it (2205)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:24am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "weighing my testicles, you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer". I'm a girl. FML

#17950170
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28860) - you deserved it (2606)

On 10/10/2011 at 4:29am - health - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I lent my sister $1000 because she and her husband were in some debt. They used the money to go gambling in Vegas and won a major jackpot. They won't even give me a cut. FML

#17948553
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35450) - you deserved it (5816)

On 10/10/2011 at 12:04am - money - by cc - United States (Montana)

Today, my Dad's banjo arrived, as part of his mid-life crisis. It would be fine if he could play it but unfortunately he's tone deaf. He hasn't stopped playing it for the last 4 hours. FML

#17927244
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22714) - you deserved it (2258)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend asked my father for permission to marry me. My father refused, on the basis that I'm the only person in the house with a job, and if I leave he will have to start looking for work. My boyfriend won't marry me without his permission, and my lazy father won't change his mind. FML

#17926185
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39247) - you deserved it (3086)

On 10/07/2011 at 5:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML

#17920889
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38784) - you deserved it (6151)

On 10/06/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

#17919622
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38868) - you deserved it (10016)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada



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