Elementsk8r7280

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Elementsk8r7280

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3392
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Elementsk8r7280 : I'd type something clever or witty here, but I honestly can't think of anything at this moment. Oh well.

Elementsk8r7280's page activity

Visits<b>redwrath</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 5:27pm<b>asnakelovinbabe</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 1:19am<b>KarmaIsBeautiful</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 5:08pm<b>whatismyusername</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 6:35pm<b>ThisIsHard</b> - the 04/20/2013 at 7:52pm<b>FIFAxLegacy</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 2:49pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 10:46pm<b>doctorhook86</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 1:55am<b>dpr130498</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 12:10pm<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 9:24pm<b>swagisforchumps</b> - the 03/20/2013 at 4:08pm<b>oj101</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 3:55pm<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 5:22pm<b>mjhakes</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 6:46pm<b>EsOSiQueEs</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 6:11pm<b>gneask</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 11:56pm<b>sktlzz14</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 3:38pm

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Elementsk8r7280's favorite FMLs

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids

Today, I tried to hint to my husband that we needed a new washing machine. I mentioned that we got our current one way back on our wedding day. He replied, "Yeah, and I got you too." FML

by poluxe / 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm / France / Love

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I spent almost $200 on a planetarium show with my boyfriend, who loves astronomy. He said his favorite thing about it was that he could pick his nose without anyone noticing. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2011 at 2:31pm / United States / Love

Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML

by danthecomplicate / 09/28/2011 at 10:28pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

by Unluckiest Guy of the group / 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

by mimi / 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

by DeadScared / 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was on a train when we hit and killed a person. We were stalled for 4 hours. The guy sitting next to me asked what I did for a living, so I told him that I'm a vet tech. Then he showed me his infected elbow. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2011 at 10:51am / United States / Transportation

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

by KJL / 08/29/2011 at 11:38am / United States / Health

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2011 at 6:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML

by Pissedoff777 / 08/12/2011 at 1:33am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that after he gets off work, he can find me in his room wearing something sexy. He responded with, "Please don't touch anything." FML

by Elizabeth / 07/29/2011 at 3:56pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML

by failure / 07/29/2011 at 2:19am / United States (California) / Love