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EightInchNails's FML badges
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EightInchNails's favorite FMLs
Today, I was walking by a bunch of pretty girls. I'm not the most attractive boy, so I walked by nervously. I heard one yell "Hey cutie!" I turned to look, and they started laughing. She said "Oh my god, sorry! I assumed you were cute from your butt!" Apparently, my ass is nicer than my face. FML
by bitches. / 06/14/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, was my senior prom. I've had a crush on my date for months, but after many attempts at grinding with him and sexy seduction, he rejected me saying he was a good Catholic boy. I later found out that not only is he in touch with his religion, but intimately in touch with other boys. FML
by failatboys / 06/13/2009 at 11:06pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, my mom walks into my room, with a serious look on her face asks me "When a man is getting it from behind, the man on top orgasms, but what happens to the man on bottom? Do you think he takes care of himself or what?" Hand motions were included. FML
by Anonymous / 06/09/2009 at 4:14am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML
by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML
by Sad / 03/01/2009 at 4:08am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by stillsingleladies / 02/17/2009 at 10:27am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML
by JLoistheBomb / 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by DC / 02/08/2009 at 7:37am / United States (California) / Love
by Champs / 01/25/2009 at 12:52pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Wenny / 01/18/2009 at 7:41am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
by Shantoya / 01/17/2009 at 2:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
- Today, I turned 18. My dad congratulated me and gifted me his collection of old porn magazines. Not… Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the… Today, my fiancé threatened to break up with me if our dog couldn't be the best man at our wedding.…