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EightInchNails's favorite FMLs
by Hayley / 01/10/2010 at 10:37pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/26/2009 at 10:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by lonelyman / 11/20/2009 at 2:29am / United States (Florida) / Love
by nycplywood / 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML
by BaconBreathBlonde / 10/29/2009 at 8:33pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/30/2009 at 5:31am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Miscellaneous
by Annoymous / 09/03/2009 at 6:19am / Australia (South Australia) / Kids
Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML
by demk / 08/20/2009 at 10:51am / United States (New York) / Love
by JPF / 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML
by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw my girlfriend going into my best friend's dorm room and suspected her to cheat on me so I placed a camera in his room to spy on them. In the end, I discovered that my girlfriend has problems in math and both my best friend and brother are gay. FML
by Anonymous / 08/08/2009 at 3:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Love
Today, I said to our pool-boy, "I know what you're doing, and you have to stop it." He started shouting that I had no right to tell them what to do and that they were in love. He was referring to his relationship with my eldest son. I wanted to tell him to stop drinking my beers. FML
by Anonymous / 07/23/2009 at 7:13am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids
Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML
by hatboxghost / 07/09/2009 at 1:17am / United States / Love
by shandrith / 07/03/2009 at 10:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/26/2009 at 10:31am / United States (Rhode Island) / Holidays
- 1Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 2Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…