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Dzra898

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Dzra898

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1619
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Dzra898's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I went out on his boat. We got in the water and started to have sex when a fishing boat came by and chummed. There's nothing more romantic than bloody fish guts. FML

#19666580
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19653) - you deserved it (9650)

On 05/23/2012 at 5:38am - intimacy - by Fire0fisis (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML

#19664729
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25116) - you deserved it (4086)

On 05/22/2012 at 9:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was messing around in computer class, when somebody called my name from the hall. Trying to be smooth, I tried rolling my chair backwards out into the hall. The wheels wasted no time jamming and sending me crashing face-first into the floor in front of everyone. FML

#19662501
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8269) - you deserved it (22394)

On 05/22/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML

#19659146
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7059) - you deserved it (33956)

On 05/21/2012 at 9:05pm - misc - by bronco_lover89 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's been three weeks since I started using a hair-growth shampoo in the hopes of combating my balding. All it's done so far is make the hair I do have monstrously bushy, both upstairs and down. FML

#19658490
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17747) - you deserved it (3881)

On 05/21/2012 at 6:47pm - health - by bear - Norway (Nordland)

Today, while in the bathroom, I started absent-mindedly drumming on my thighs. I didn't stop to think that people outside would think I was masturbating. FML

#19655658
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21401) - you deserved it (6876)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by morethanredhands -

Today, someone threw an open soda can at me from a car. It missed, so they circled around and threw an unopened can. That one hit. FML

#19653798
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22336) - you deserved it (1652)

On 05/20/2012 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

#19652024
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22764) - you deserved it (2648)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

#19652024
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22764) - you deserved it (2648)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States

Today, I spilled boiling water on my legs. A coworker told me that putting mustard on the burn would heal it. I ended up at the emergency room. When people walked by I could hear them say "it smells like hot dogs". FML

#19651204
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19418) - you deserved it (7716)

On 05/20/2012 at 11:03am - health - by jcdc - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML

#19649582
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8470) - you deserved it (22021)

On 05/20/2012 at 12:06am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47319) - you deserved it (4382)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I'm on a trip to Poland with some friends. We came to experience the country's culture, and to challenge our preconceptions about this part of Europe. We had sat on a bench, and not ten seconds later, a stranger approached and asked, "How much for your friend?" FML

#19626954
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20251) - you deserved it (2510) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/15/2012 at 11:59am - misc - by LearnToLive -

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38018) - you deserved it (3972) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML

#19615713
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28491) - you deserved it (2757)

On 05/13/2012 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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