Dweeble

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Offline (the 08/22/2014 at 7:42pm)

Dweeble

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 24 May 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4883
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Dweeble : Name's Julian. Love to run, eat, read, listen to music.
Things to know about FML: Don't post about your weather or else everyone will try to be hot-shit and complain about theirs, Never ever post about cigarettes or you'll be downvoted to oblivion...Noor is hilarious.

Dweeble's page activity

Visits<b>katydid91</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 3:51am<b>adrianramz69</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 11:05pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 2:57pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 7:24pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 4:27pm<b>ColtonStecher</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 10:45pm<b>janujc</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 2:55pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 9:24pm<b>dontpanic</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 6:36am<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 8:03pm<b>sarah_grace_baby</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 7:09am<b>oj101</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 7:00am<b>BrookieAnn</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 11:53pm<b>botanistjessica</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 11:28pm<b>DerrickJames</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 4:10am<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 03/01/2013 at 4:52pm<b>Mahtari</b> - the 12/21/2012 at 4:21am

Dweeble's FML badges

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Dweeble's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend cutely climbed through my bedroom window for some sexy time. He decided he'd introduce bondage. As I was tied to the bed, completely naked, we heard the front door open. He got scared and left via the window, leaving me handcuffed to my bed. FML

Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML

by megasniper240 / 06/19/2012 at 11:35am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2012 at 12:51am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, I came out of the closet. I came out on Facebook to spare myself awkward conversations and gossip. I wrote a deeply meaningful status about my partner and my pride in who I was. The only responses were, "Lol", "Hacked", and similar remarks. FML

by OutOfTheCloset / 06/02/2012 at 2:50am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving home, when some kid on a motorbike shot in front of me from the pavement, almost running me off the road. When I confronted him, he screamed, "Watch where you're going next time!" If I could flush every last one of these human turds from the toilet of life, I would. FML

by cunting cunts / 05/29/2012 at 1:10pm / United Kingdom (Ealing) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

by sopheeah / 05/29/2012 at 3:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I was walking up some stairs, and I told the guy in front of me to be careful, as the handrail was loose and well-worn. I then put my hand on it, and promptly fell backwards down the stairs with a piece of handrail still in my hand. FML

by taob / 05/20/2012 at 1:11pm / China (Guangxi) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spilled boiling water on my legs. A coworker told me that putting mustard on the burn would heal it. I ended up at the emergency room. When people walked by I could hear them say "it smells like hot dogs". FML

by jcdc / 05/20/2012 at 11:03am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML

by Grindyloo / 05/05/2012 at 6:06am / Kids

Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML

by Grindyloo / 05/05/2012 at 6:06am / Kids

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

by A Henderson / 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm / United States / Work

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

by KC / 04/25/2012 at 4:06pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Kids

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

by intheairtonight / 04/25/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, a therapist told me that I was too depressed to attend his depression group meetings. FML

by Sad Sally / 04/24/2012 at 7:22am / United States / Health