About Doortje : Best cupcake ever.
Doortje's FML badges
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Doortje's favorite FMLs
Today, I woke up to an early Christmas present on my car. It was a nicely wrapped box containing a dead bird, a half eaten sandwich, and a note reading "MERRY F**KING CHRISTMAS STAN." This will probably be my only Christmas present. My name is Luke. FML
by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 9:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals
by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 4:55pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids
by Doortje / 12/12/2010 at 6:37am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Miscellaneous
by parentfail / 12/11/2010 at 9:44am / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML
by Anonymous / 12/09/2010 at 9:23pm / United States / Health
Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "my mom is SO awesome." FML
by ooblie / 12/08/2010 at 3:22am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 7:39pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/30/2010 at 2:10pm / Ireland (Monaghan) / Health
by bleh / 11/26/2010 at 7:23pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
by sydysyd / 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/21/2010 at 9:49am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy
by pst / 11/20/2010 at 8:06pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 7:26pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, my boyfriend asked me to meet his parents over Christmas. I was ecstatic. But there was one condition: I must go dressed as a girl since he hasn't worked up the nerve to come out to his parents yet. We've been dating for over a year. FML
by neverdateaclosetcase / 11/17/2010 at 1:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy
- Today, it’s exam day in Sweden. Yesterday, I prepared three fountain pens and six cartridges. The… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without…