About Doortje : Best cupcake ever.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I posted my status on Facebook as "slightly hungover." My grandma commented on it with "liar, you were helping me clean last night." She's right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10316) - you deserved it (48165)
On 05/17/2011 at 12:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was making out with this guy that I like. In an attempt to be romantic, he tried to pick me up and press me against the wall. He couldn't lift me off the ground. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32719) - you deserved it (11389)
On 05/16/2011 at 10:12pm - love - by Fatty (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35502) - you deserved it (15864)
On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States
Today, I brought my girlfriend of four months home for dinner to meet my parents. The first thing my mom says to her? "Oh my God, you're real!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29783) - you deserved it (3398)
On 05/04/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Charlie (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my "friend" told me I was weird and irritating. Yet she has an unhealthy obsession with Harry Potter, hates people in general, and has a Facebook for her cat. Yeah, I'm the weird one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28153) - you deserved it (5992)
On 04/26/2011 at 5:45am - animals - by weirdome23 (woman) - United States
Today, my "friend" told me I was weird and irritating. Yet she has an unhealthy obsession with Harry Potter, hates people in general, and has a Facebook for her cat. Yeah, I'm the weird one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28153) - you deserved it (5992)
On 04/26/2011 at 5:45am - animals - by weirdome23 (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in front of an entire street of people. We've only been dating for a week. One of the women in the crowd then called me heartless and threw a hamburger at me when I turned him down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42139) - you deserved it (7297)
On 04/25/2011 at 9:49am - love - by Jade (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)
Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26960) - you deserved it (7539)
On 04/24/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7414) - you deserved it (91186)
Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60869) - you deserved it (7583)
On 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm - intimacy - by Johntheladdo (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26719) - you deserved it (3839)
On 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm - misc - by uggo - United States
Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26719) - you deserved it (3839)
On 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm - misc - by uggo - United States
Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26719) - you deserved it (3839)
On 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm - misc - by uggo - United States
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30153) - you deserved it (24880)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14048) - you deserved it (64585)
On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
