Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Doortje

Offline (the 12/18/2015 at 12:29am) | Search for a member

Doortje

17Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 April 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 26922
  • Number of comments : 1885
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Doortje : Best cupcake ever.

Doortje's page activity

Visits<b>agostina_mc</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 8:20pm<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 1:03am<b>PHP</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:53pm<b>jaala123</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:43am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:10pm<b>IcedSapphire</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 4:03pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 1:53am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:26pm<b>emisheah</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 11:23pm<b>FuckFace10</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 9:45pm<b>homesuckfucker</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 1:12am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:30am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 4:21am<b>Rainbowkupkake</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 11:09pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 4:42am<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 9:45pm<b>uglykitty</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 5:09pm<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 5:15pm

Fucked!<b>emisheah</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 5:23am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 10:22am<b>eski2015</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 4:29pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 11:48pm<b>thatguy206</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 1:24am<b>Emmamazing</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 3:05am<b>Zebracat</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>16sparklytrees</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 10:24pm<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:06pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 4:52am<b>taffyluvr226</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:43pm<b>Sansa</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 8:17am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:09pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 4:55am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:01am<b>Puffpie</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 9:42am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:30pm

Doortje's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Doortje's badges

Doortje's favorite FMLs

Today, I did a 'dine and dash' and left my phone in the restaurant. The owner answered my phone call. FML

#7321652
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5655) - you deserved it (78924)

On 01/13/2010 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had the sudden urge to sneeze as I was wiping my ass. Out of instinct, I used my hand to cover my mouth. I never let go of the toilet paper. FML

#7217520
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28064) - you deserved it (35805)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband is completely convinced that his taking a massive dump after being constipated is exactly like the time I gave birth to our twins. FML

#7215962
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34466) - you deserved it (4312)

On 01/08/2010 at 11:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom finally believed me when I said I smelled mold. I lifted up the couch, and it was covered in mold. So were the bottoms of all our furniture, our beds, and my grandma's vintage chair. We've been living in mold for the past 4 months. FML

#7183279
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29819) - you deserved it (4795)

On 01/06/2010 at 4:28pm - health - by moudly (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my mom finally believed me when I said I smelled mold. I lifted up the couch, and it was covered in mold. So were the bottoms of all our furniture, our beds, and my grandma's vintage chair. We've been living in mold for the past 4 months. FML

#7183279
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29819) - you deserved it (4795)

On 01/06/2010 at 4:28pm - health - by moudly (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went on a blind date that my best friend had set up for me. When I arrived, I introduced myself and we sat at the table. After we ordered our food, he asked the waiter for some crayons and a kid's menu, and colored for the half hour before our food came. He didn't talk to me at all. FML

#7169187
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31478) - you deserved it (3851)

On 01/05/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my brother and I got in a fight and he told my friends that I am mentally disabled. They believed him. Apparently, "everything makes sense now." FML

#6730698
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30310) - you deserved it (3695)

On 12/12/2009 at 11:39pm - misc - by Normal (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went on a date and it was going great. When we got our meals, he told me I had to try what he was having, and he fed me a bite. I said something like "oh that was cute" and he replied with "I was just trying to see how big your mouth is." FML

#6428684
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30980) - you deserved it (4022)

On 11/23/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by OpenWide (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got a well paying job that requires me to drive around and present a product to potential customers. After going out for a victory meal with friends, I came home to find my car broken into, and my GPS stolen. I need it for the job. FML

#6152336
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28524) - you deserved it (4225)

On 11/04/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a well paying job that requires me to drive around and present a product to potential customers. After going out for a victory meal with friends, I came home to find my car broken into, and my GPS stolen. I need it for the job. FML

#6152336
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28524) - you deserved it (4225)

On 11/04/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my math teacher decided to use my acne as an example of symmetry in front of the whole class. FML

#5924929
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55818) - you deserved it (3911)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:59am - health - by acneface (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML

#5872159
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46458) - you deserved it (3586)

On 10/17/2009 at 10:25pm - love - by userrrrr - United States (North Carolina)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: