DontThumbMeDown

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DontThumbMeDown

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4838
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DontThumbMeDown : DARYL MOTHERFUCKIN DIXON

DontThumbMeDown's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 10:01am<b>edenxero</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 4:28am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 10:33am<b>Pikachu12</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:20am<b>cainightroad</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 2:49am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 4:47pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 2:14pm<b>RRRAAAAIIINNN</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 1:42am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 10:15pm<b>ImAFaker</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 11:26pm<b>buttery_nipples</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 10:37am<b>hexblot</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 1:04am<b>coolcat72</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 8:52pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 7:17pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 12:58am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 10:27pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 2:08pm<b>TheBrochure</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 12:01pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 4:33pm

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DontThumbMeDown's favorite FMLs

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 12:56am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

by Target / 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

by mydadsgonnakillme / 02/08/2013 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML

by hamandegger / 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML

by frozensolid / 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Transportation

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 7:48am / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

by methane overload / 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm / Iceland / Work

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

by Keastwood013 / 01/18/2013 at 10:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML

by dormeur / 01/18/2013 at 6:39am / Animals

Today, after battling for hours to get just a little sleep before my early morning work shift, I finally began drifting off. Then I got the worst attack of hiccups in my life. FML

by FMyThroat / 01/17/2013 at 7:39pm / Peru (Lima) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom wished me "Happy Conception Day." FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2013 at 4:08pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

by itsrathersmall / 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy