Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Donovan_757

Search for a member

Donovan_757

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 19 December 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2921
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Donovan_757 : Currently in school majoring in Criminal Justice to become a cop. Just here to read about the fucked up lives being posted to get a laugh at.

Donovan_757's page activity

Visits<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 7:00pm<b>nanoinch</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 7:57pm<b>Kautkto</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 11:40pm<b>LilMissMad</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 11:45pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 7:35pm<b>SammyKins18</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 7:09pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 5:30am<b>bambi1989</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 1:12am<b>Gestpacho88</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 5:30pm<b>Incognito23</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 6:07am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:34am<b>Trish01</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 1:23am<b>need2sleep</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 12:15am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 11:44pm<b>forever_alone16</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 10:56pm<b>miwako</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 12:41am<b>Antonia583</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 5:45pm<b>scncman</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 9:50am

Donovan_757's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Donovan_757's badges

Donovan_757's favorite FMLs

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (6119)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I faced a dilemma. If I don't let the cat sleep in my bedroom, she spends all night howling at the door, waking up my 2-year-old in the process. If I do let her in, the dog gets distressed and chews the contents of the bin. If I let both of them in, I have no room to sleep. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I had a disagreement over the pronunciation of the word "train." It turned into a heated debate that lasted all night and ended with us sleeping in separate rooms. FML

Today, my elbow was having cramps and movement issues as a result of an old set of surgical pins and wires that are being rejected by my body. One painful twitch caused my arm to lock out straight, unintentionally slapping my hand into my co-worker's crotch. Our waiting customers giggled. FML

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

#20189453
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30675) - you deserved it (3789)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

#20189050
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20845) - you deserved it (1449)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20368) - you deserved it (7844)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21496) - you deserved it (1870)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

#20187648
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25896) - you deserved it (2548)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML

#20187584
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30661) - you deserved it (10483)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

#20187578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29462) - you deserved it (2215)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:03am - love - by Anna - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24943) - you deserved it (2772)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

#20185787
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36170) - you deserved it (3392)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by julia (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

#20184636
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31000) - you deserved it (8799)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by lizzard0416 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 5 kids were singing their favorite Christmas carols in the van, each trying to sing louder than the others. It would have probably sounded better if they were all singing the same song. FML

#20183806
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20278) - you deserved it (3909)

On 11/29/2012 at 9:22am - kids - by Dave (man) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: